Here and there, we all have those periods of time in which everything seems to be falling apart and nothing is going the way we want it to. The past few weeks I've been having a rough go. I've had a relationship end and sadly, it seems the friendship has also disappeared. Also, I've been dealing with trying to sort out my future. I'm not sure I'm going down the path that I want and the career path that'll make me happy. I find myself constantly thinking about if I'm making the right choices and worrying about the future, because the uncertainly definitely eats at me mentally.
This weekend, I took time for myself. I traveled back down to Lexington, Kentucky to visit a few of my best friends and to head out to my farm. While I was at the barn, I found mental peace, something I haven't had in a while. Riding horses has always been a passion of mine but the barn is somewhere that I feel safe. I get to the barn and it seems that all of my worries and problems just float away. For those few hours at the barn, my mind isn't racing. I'm not worrying about all the things I need to do that day, that week, or in the future. When I'm at the farm, I'm also surrounded by my barn family. I've created lifelong friendships at the farm and that's priceless I guess the barn is a form of therapy for me and a place I can call home.
There's a horse at the barn, Estabon who is not popular among most people at the farm. He's young, quirky, and isn't the finest looking horse out there. I, on the other hand adore him. He's a bit challenging and stubborn, but I think he's a lot like me. I tacked him up and swung myself up into the saddle. Each time I ride him, I never know what to expect. Most days he is a bit forward and spirited, but yesterday, he was different. After just trotting around the ring for about 20 minutes, he settled. He settled and I didn't have to worry if I was doing everything perfectly. I stopped thinking if my leg was in the right position, if I had too much contact on the reins; I just rode. I found this state of peace. I necessarily wasn't thinking of anything in particular, but I realized everything will work out and I have nothing to worry about. Just because I may travel down a wrong path here and there doesn't mean I won't find my way to the right path. I don't have to have it all figured out right now, tomorrow, or this year. When the time is right, I'll know what I want to do and I'll make sure I get there.
We all need to find our form of therapy. When you're having a bad day or are just in need of a pick-me up, do something that you're passionate about or go to your "happy place." You won't regret it.
