Relationships can be messy and complicated because everyone brings their own baggage into them. When you have a mental illness such as Bipolar, it creates even more undue friction. The other person may worry that they may have to send you to the hospital for suicidal thoughts or fear that day where you break down. It takes a real special, patient person to understand mental illness in a relationship.

The worst type of person in a relationship though are those that simply don't care. They treat you how they believe you deserve to be treated based on their judgment of your illness. They evaluate it based on how you display it. They either accept or reject these certain behaviors, act on those judgments of character, and attempt to call it affection.

In particular, when I told boys in my college years that I have Bipolar disorder, they took that to mean that I am hypersexual, promiscuous, adventurous, etc. Because they wanted a fun time, they would pursue me in hopes that I would spice up their life. However, I brought my own emotional problems into the relationship because they weren't seeing me for who I really was. Once the emotional cat was out of the bag, these boys would leave.

Being Bipolar isn't a lifestyle choice as they seem to think. Their lack of awareness towards the mental illness proves that they will continue to objectify women even in their frailty of mind. Once, a male Uber driver had to drive me to the hospital because I was paranoid my new roommate was going to hurt me. He asked me why I was going there and I explained my state of mind. He then talked about how I peaked his interest in psychology and I had to stop him. "Men tend to fetishize Bipolar disorder in women because they don't want to understand it," I said. "You think it's such an easy way to have your own adventure by painting us to be more than we are, but essentially, you're preying on emotionally defenseless women. And that's the worst kind of predator."

So men, don't be that guy who sexualizes or romanticizes mental illness in women. We're not crazy because you say so or because you want that in your life. Our craziness does not revolve around making your life more interesting. In fact, when I tell people that I have Bipolar disorder, it isn't to shock them but to prepare them for the manias and depressions that will inevitably come. My wish in communication to you with my mental illness is not for your entertainment; I am not just an adventure to be had. I am just as worthy of being taken seriously as any other woman.

Yet, I know you will continue to prey on emotionally defenseless, vulnerable women with mental illness because that's what you are used to doing to get your way. I will say it time and time again—a mental illness is not a lifestyle choice. But it is also not something that will define me. Having Bipolar is one small facet of my life that should never be taken for granted. I won't let my illness hold me down, so don't expect me to think that a man should instead.