The 13 Phases Of Your Fall Semester, As Told By 'Parks And Rec'

The 13 Phases Of Your Fall Semester, As Told By 'Parks And Rec'

I used to be a Leslie, but college has turned me into a Ron.
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Ah, Fall: a time of football games, pumpkin flavored everything and, unfortunately, school starting back up. Don't get me wrong, school can be great and all, but sometimes it makes me want to drown myself in the closest sorority girl's pumpkin spice latte.

From insane professors to late night studies, college can often test your will to survive, or at least your will to graduate. Regardless of how stressful it gets, we often push through to the end. Each semester will take its usual course, and what better way of explaining this incredible journey than by the cast of Parks and Rec?

1. Syllabus week

You usually start off confident, maybe even a little ambitious if you want to get crazy. I think it's something to do with getting new school supplies that makes us feel like we "have it all together."

2. The first weekend of the semester

Now that you've finished your first week of the year, why not celebrate? This is when classes are the easiest so take advantage of this one time of not being completely stressed and have a little fun.

3. First major test/assignment is due

You want to start off on the right foot, right? Not being 100% on how the teacher grades, you try your hardest to get that A.

4. The first "I think I'm going to skip"

You think you've gotten the hang of things and your grades are looking good, so why not skip? Well, considering you or someone else is having to pay for you to be there, you probably shouldn't. So, even though it may seem impossible, try to resist this temptation.

5. The mornings start to get a little harder

Just picture that phone as my alarm clock.

6. When your professors start acting like their class is the only class you take

But why do some professors like to make intro classes as difficult as they possibly can? This is an intro bio exam, not the MCAT.

7. It's is FINALLY Thanksgiving break

^ ^ ^ My response whenever a relative asks how college is going.

At least you get to hoard up on all the Thanksgiving leftovers so you have something to stress eat later.

8. Break is over, so now back to ignoring my problems

Now that break is over and finals week is on the horizon, reality has never hit so hard, but you did JUST get back from break so I'm sure those problems can wait a little longer?

9. Assignments are in full over-drive as professors desperately cram everything in before finals

^ ^ ^ Imagine: Tammy is an overwhelming amount of schoolwork and you are Leslie.

10. Beginning of finals week

This is what the entire semester has been leading up to and YOU GO THIS.

11. Mid finals week

Wow, okay, you def don't "GOT THIS."

12. End of finals week

Because of the lack of sleep and extreme stress you may be a tad loopy, but don't let it distract you! Just push through the next exam or two and then you're done!

13. When you finish your last final

Rolling into Christmas break like ^ ^ ^

Cover Image Credit: NBC Universal

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Every Time I See A College Tour Group Walk By I Just Want to Scream 'It's a TRAAAPP!'

The tour guide is good - they're just a liar.
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It's officially that time of year - anywhere you walk on campus, there's bound to be a gaggle of parents and befuddled high school students winding their way through building after building. In front of them stands an overenthusiastic tour guide, spouting off statistics about the school so fast they'll make your head spin.

Unfortunately, what the tour guide says doesn't exactly line up with what goes on at the school. Oh, the things we students wish we could shout out to the parents as they pass by.

1. "You'll get sick of the dining!"

It may look like there's something new to eat every single day, but by the end of the semester, you'll be sick of everything except the things closest at home.

2. "I'm only here for the free t-shirts!"

Seriously.

3. "IT'S A TRAP!"

Seriously, part two. You get two of three things: a social life, sleep, or good grades. Whoever said you could have all three is lying.

4. "Welcome to the real world, suckers!"

It's got confrontation, taking care of yourself, and formal emails. (Which, of course, your professor will respond with 'k thnx bai' sent from their iPhone.)

5. "Say goodbye to sleep!"

There are three types of people on campus: tea drinkers, coffee drinkers, and people with energy drinks running through their veins.

6. "THE MODEL DORM IS A LIE!"

Check all of your housing options before you move in. The dorm they're showing you might be the worst housing area on campus.

7. "THE FINANCIAL AID IS A LIE!"

You're getting squat. Free tuition? Try the tune of $13k a year. Or more. Depending.

8. "The library is NOT the best study place."

Depending on your major, there are several places for you to study that aren't the library.

9. "The health center sucks!"

True fact: word through the grapevine is that someone once got antibiotics for a sprained ankle.You may as well sell that leg on the black market to cover the costs.

10. "Believe the roommate horror stories!"

All random roommates are horrible unless proven otherwise. (But be wary of everyone.)

11. "SI (student instructor) sessions are useless."

You will learn nothing . Chances are you'll end up correcting the instructor.

12. "The freshman fifteen is optional."

Some people don't gain it at all, and some people really gain it. It's up to you.

13. "You'll need a car!!"

If, for some reason you can't pay for the overpriced parking pass, find a friend who can.

14. "Hookup culture is real!"

But it's not for everyone. Just because everyone is doing it doesn't mean you have to.

15. "Campus jobs are a myth!"

Campus job? What's a campus job? Do you have work-study? No? No job for you. Have you tried the local coffee shop?

Cover Image Credit: Flickr

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