In high school, just the thought of spending time with my friends and hanging out with them was enough to make me incredibly happy and excited. I would think of what I’d wear, the pictures we would take, the time that would fly by, and the “6-pack feeling” I would get in my tummy after laughing so hard. I used to look forward to these moments more than any other and I was extremely grateful to have friends who I could laugh with and be silly with.
I don’t know if it’s called “growing up” but I can’t seem to find that feeling anymore. I am rarely as excited to meet people and I find that I am perfectly happy spending time alone. The time spent with my friends never used to be enough, but now, I find myself thinking of excuses to get up and leave.
Despite this appreciation for time spent with myself, I miss the giddying-excitement I used to feel and wish I could feel it again.
What is it about growing up that has made maintaining friendships seem like a task rather than a laughter-filled break from life? Seldom do I hear my obnoxious laugh anymore and seldom do I meet someone who I can talk hours and hours with. Perhaps my past friendships were filled with so much laughter and happiness that my expectations for what friendships should be like are unrealistic. If there isn't gut-wrenching laughter or a very interesting conversation, I find the time spent pointless.
What is it about growing up that has taken away my excitement? Perhaps, adulthood takes away one’s excitement because of added responsibilities, worries, and routine. Your friendships simply lose priority because you are busy focussing on more important things.
But isn’t friendship important? Don’t your relationships bring value to your life? We surely don’t live to work and achieve big things to “make a difference in the world” when we can’t even make a difference in the lives of those around us. Nobody cares if you are a Harvard graduate and have accomplished great feats in your life if you aren’t a nice, caring person. And you can’t be a “nice, caring person” if you don’t make time for your family and friends.
All change starts at home. We need to ask ourselves what we can do for our family day-by-day that will make their lives happier and easier. After that, we need to ask ourselves, what we can do for our friends day-by-day that will make their lives happier and easier. Then, and only then, does it make sense to move bigger and ask ourselves, “What can I do for my local community that will make peoples’ lives happier and easier?”
Your community is your world.
Your friends are your world.
Your family is your world.
If you want to make a difference in the world, then look at what you are doing for your little world. This is the world that has provided so much for you and this is the world you have to give back to. When you die, a random person from another part of the globe won’t grieve for you and pray for you, your own family, friends, and community will.
As a living human being with the potential to make a person’s life better, I get worried when I sense my fading excitement regarding friendships. My friendships were one avenue I had to help make the world a better place, At this point, I am unsure that I will ever get my excitement back, but I hope and pray that I will always be there for others and make time for my loved ones.
If I make one person in the world smile more, I will feel that I have made a difference in the world.
