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I Found Out The Hard Way That Your First Kiss Isn't Always Like How It Is In The Movies

Spoiler alert: It was a disaster.

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I Found Out The Hard Way That Your First Kiss Isn't Always Like How It Is In The Movies
https://www.netflix.com/watch/80014136?trackId=14170056&tctx=6%2C8%2C2ba0aba8-099c-4dab-8fde-a26c1cc865c1-22890326%2C1195ca77-05eb-4208-a873-350820958b67_9933106X10XX1548483219337%2C1195ca77-05eb-4208-a873-350820958b67_ROOT

For some reason, society seems to put a lot of pressure on girls and their first kiss. It's like losing your lip virginity is a right of passage into teenage-hood.

As you can tell, I was never one of those girls who looked forward to the fateful day where someone would smush their crusty lips against mine in order to show that they like me. In fact, I dreaded the day a boy would decidedly attack my mouth with his. What if I wasn't ready? What if it was terrible? What if I was terrible?

Yet, that day came Valentine's Day my sophomore year of high school. A senior (I know, scandalous) had let his feelings for me be known by chocolates and flowers during our lunch break. I know, I know, romantic. I, however, had let him know that although I would like to "hang out", I was sick and would not be able to consummate the relationship with a kiss just yet.

In fact, I avoided him for an entire. week.

For some reason, I was DREADING the kiss, but I knew it was going to happen.

It was like I was waiting for a volcano to break the surface and destroy all the surrounding villages and happy living creatures. The smoke was building up and all the bird were flying away because they knew something was about to happen. Sure, I liked him, but I wasn't super attracted to him and I really didn't care about being in a relationship at the time.

Should I have let him know that in the first place? Yes. Should I not have avoided him a whole week just to avoid kissing him? Yes. Should I have done a lot of things differently? Yes.

But as fate would have it, the kiss would happen one cold afternoon in the parking lot after school. Again, so romantic.

I was walking with a few of my friends and he was walking closely next to me, trying to hold my hand. I knew what was about to happen and was trying to hide the sound of my ragged breaths that sounded like I weighed 200 pounds and just ran up a flight of stairs. I was sweating and nervous. I couldn't feel my hand or legs. I thought I might pass out.

Can you picture it now? Can you feel my little 15-year-old nerves and the ever-growing awkwardness that seemed to be consuming me?

Once we arrived in the parking lot, it seemed like there was a full audience.

All my friends seemed to be there. Like, every single one of them.

One of my friends was parked in the spot directly in front of us, with about 5 other people in her mini-van. There were a few friends further away in the parking lot. And a few more of my friends were in my car parked next to us on the side. There was no escaping.

I was terrified. I thought I was going to throw up or faint or die.

Could you imagine? Just up-chucking inside the mouth of the guy that just told you he likes you. Or having your lips freeze together because it was the middle of February and you have terrible circulation. Every bad scenario that could possibly happen was going through my mind.

And then he went in for a hug. Twice. It was torture. I thought it was gonna be quick and over- but no. He was nervous too and I thought maybe he wouldn't do it.

But boy, was I wrong.

After the quickest peck in the history of ever, I booked it to my car and drove off way too quickly with only so much as a whispered "bye".

Was that what I was so worked up about? Was that the magic that everyone was talking about? That all the books and movies always talked about?

What. the. heck.

Once I got home, I (of course) told my mom and started crying. I cried over a dang peck. A smudge. A flailing of lips on lips that resulting in me being disappointed and realizing that I just really didn't like this boy. My mom told me that I couldn't keep just avoiding him while being in a relationship. And I couldn't deny that the woman was right.

Long story short, I broke up with him that night (over the phone- I know, I know, don't judge me) and tried not to speak about it ever again.

But honestly, it was a pretty great story that I learned to laugh about after a while.

So, to the guy who gave me my first kiss, I'm sorry I wasn't ready, and thanks for giving me a moment I'll never forget.

And to the young girls who are waiting for the perfect first kiss, sometimes it's just not gonna happen like it is in the movies.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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