Today we live in an age where every topic has become controversial. For some, this might seem like a success, allowing more and more people to share their opinions and likes and dislikes with the surrounding world. For others, it seems like they can't make any comment without having someone attempt to prove them wrong. I'm not here to take a side, but I am here to talk about a controversial topic that most people might expect me to defend due to my age.
I'd like to talk about dating. And I'd like to talk about social media. There are hundreds of pros and cons to this new reality adults and children alike have adopted as the norm. As a teenager, whose life I'll admittedly say can somewhat revolve around my phone, I've come to realize that this little device has caused much more damage than good. Again, as a teenager, I've also seen countless relationships fall apart because of the rules social media has placed on dating in my generation.
Not only are relationships now starting at a much younger age, they are also advancing at a much faster pace, all due to the technology that we love to praise. It has become increasingly easier to learn about a person by what might not be considered stalking but is essentially stalking, a person's social media pages. But, this all comes with a large price that is not always considered. Things are easily lost in translation when it comes to technology. For instance, essential aspects of a person such as body language, tone of voice, facial expressions, and the like are all missing from texts, tweets, posts, and dms. My generation has become so quick to judge a person based on a string of messages and photos that are most likely bound to be misinterpreted and/or taken as not good enough. The questions that follow the text conversations between two people are honestly endless, especially when each person is trying to figure out how the other person feels.
Aside from the various ways to start a conversation full of misinterpretations and questions, there are plenty of unspoken rules that follow any conversation that originates from social media. Where they came from and who decided they were a good idea is beyond me. Nevertheless, they have wedged their way into the norm of dating and have kept numerous relationships from evolving. Many people believe responding right away to a text or message seems needy, despite the fact that it may just mean you had your phone in your hand at the precise time you received the text! I've also witnessed countless games of who can wait the longest to respond, or who can leave the other person on open/read the most. These situations happen all too often, no matter how immature each person knows they are being.
As you can see, and maybe even experienced, there are major misunderstandings and games that take place when it comes to dating through technology, and yet we completely accept these misunderstandings as normal and rational. They cause us to jump to conclusions, becoming people we are not and would probably laugh at if we were on the outside looking in. There is a loss of privacy when it comes to social media, and it hinders a person from opening up to another on their own terms. Something as simple as your location can now be made aware to your peers, leaving the sense of mystery and conversation behind, which are key and exciting aspects of a relationship.
I fear for the younger generations that will have no memories of what it was like to live in a world not dictated by the rules of social media. I long for a time when people will experience what it is like to be asked out on a real date, being sent flowers and chocolates instead of emojis and selfies. We have a lot of work to do as a generation to stop these foolish games. Love should not be any harder than it already is. It should be experienced and longed for, not feared and misinterpreted!
