Ghosting And Lying Have Become Dating Norms And That’s Pathetic

Ghosting And Lying Have Become Dating Norms And That’s Pathetic

What happened to treating others the way you wanted to be treated?

Ghosting And Lying Have Become Dating Norms And That’s Pathetic

I have a Pinterest board titled “Dreams” where I have my entire wedding planned out. A rustic, outdoor wedding with cheesy signs complete with a lace ball gown that probably weighs more than me. Oh, and let's not forget about the perfect pair of boots.

However, in order to achieve that dream I would have to find a man who doesn’t lie, doesn’t cheat, doesn’t call me only when it works for him (like at 2 a.m.), takes me to dinner instead of bars, and doesn’t make me feel like I have to worry about waking up one day to find he decided to just stop talking to me.

As I have brought up in previous articles, we are taught the golden rule on the first day of school. We are to treat others the way we would want to be treated. Do you remember when we were taught to stop following that rule? Because I don't.

Yet, our generation acts as if we were never taught how to treat others.

Ghosting is emotional abuse. Deciding to stop talking to someone out of nowhere is selfish and wrong. If they upset you, or you have an issue with something then talk about it. Yes, it is that simple. Communication is an essential part of every relationship. To be honest, it isn’t that hard. Just tell someone how you feel, be honest, and talk through problems with each other. It might not seem easy, especially with hard topics, but communication is a basic skill everyone should have.

We also have social media to blame. We only see all the perfect photoshopped parts of other people’s lives 24 hours a day. With apps like Tinder, there is no need to put work into any relationship, you can just start swiping to find someone else the second you don’t like what you see. There is no more effort.

Men, in my experience, decide to just end it with you, without telling you, and then just ignore you. Like you have no feelings. Also, we now hide behind a screen and a keyboard. We’ve lost the ability to form real connections with others and we don’t value face to face communication.

When I go out of my way for someone, I do it because I care. Because to me, they are worth the effort and my time. The men who have sat there and spent hours with me on facetime telling me that I’m the only one who has their attention and their intentions are to make me their girlfriend, who suddenly leave, are the ones with a problem.

You shouldn’t tell me you love me to just leave me in my time of need so you can date someone else.

You shouldn’t tell me everything is fine then stop talking to me.

To then call me saying you are sorry and miss me just to leave me again the next day. It’s not funny but it is certainly childish. It is a waste of my time and your time. Because in case you forgot, you date someone because you can see yourself spending the rest of your life with them. Not because you are bored and lonely.

You can treat the person you are with right or you can watch someone else do it for you.

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