Yes, I'm A College Senior, No, I Haven't Met 'Him' Yet, And That's OK

Yes, I'm A College Senior, No, I Haven't Met 'Him' Yet, And That's OK

It’s like we are all expecting to walk into the classroom and make eye contact with the person we are going to spend the rest of our lives with.
Emina Pelja
Emina Pelja Sep 25, 2017
571
views

As I’m finishing up my senior year of college, I cannot help but wonder why I haven’t met him yet.

You would think that after almost four years of self-discovery, things would be different. I have transformed my self-limiting beliefs by journaling, let go of the things I cannot change by practicing yoga, and pursued the dreams that scare me the most, yet I have not attracted him into my life. At least, not yet.

It’s like we are all expecting to walk into the classroom and make eye contact with the person we are going to spend the rest of our lives with.

That sounds pretty far-fetched, doesn’t it? I’m not saying that it couldn’t happen, but for most of us, it’s almost like we are choosing an attractive guy to pursue and just hoping that maybe things will work out magically. While this sounds absolutely beautiful and all, it’s just not reality.

I do believe that the people we attract into our lives are dependant on the energy that we give off. If you’re the type of person who makes light of every situation, no matter how good or bad, people will want to be around you. At the same time, just because you are a positive person doesn’t mean you are going to find your soulmate in college.

I am not saying that you should completely give up.

Take advantage of this time where let’s face it: most people aren’t looking to find their soulmate. Flirt with the guy in your class, go out on dates, but for God’s sake, quit worrying about the outcome. Let go of the fact that you like to be in control of everything in your life and focus on going after opportunities, not people.

SEE ALSO: 21 Dating Lessons College Girls Learn At 21

I understand that there are people out there who have found their soulmate in college, and maybe some of them don’t even know it yet. While I am sure that is an incredible feeling, it kinda scares the shit out of me. I am 21 years old, there are so many places I still want to see, so many things I still want to do. If a guy does not want to be by my side, doing those things with me, or at least encouraging me to go after them, then I just don’t have time for him.

Yes, I know a relationship is a two-way street and I am not saying that I wouldn’t do the same for him, but it is so incredibly difficult to come across someone who believes in what I am saying.

I know that I am not the only one who feels this way.

It’s not that we are desperately out there looking for someone, it’s the fact that we, as women, have chosen to better ourselves first and are just waiting on the Universe to answer our prayers. My hope is that those of you reading this can learn to make peace with your current situation and accept the fact that there is someone out there dying to meet you, he may even be reading this article, you really just never know.

Cover Image Credit: Pixabay
Emina Pelja
Emina Pelja Sep 25, 2017
At Kennesaw State University

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Why You Should Stop Chasing Him

You deserve better.
Rachel Schier
Rachel Schier Mar 7, 2016
23722
views

They say “the thrill of the chase" makes someone more enticing. There's just something about wanting something you can't have that drives you crazy (in a good way). There is never a dull moment. Pursuing him is a challenge. Nothing comes easily. What's the fun in that anyway?

I'm going to tell you this: stop chasing him. Stop forgiving him when he forgets to answer your text messages and phone calls. Stop being the one to always make plans. Stop letting him bail on you. Stop waiting around for him. Stop being lied to. Stop making excuses when he doesn't make time for you. There is a difference between someone who is “hard to get" and a flat out jerk who doesn't give you the time of day. Stop letting him use you.

You deserve to be with someone who makes you fall asleep every night in the middle of texting him because neither of you want the conversation to end. You deserve someone who plans dates for the two of you. You deserve someone who asks you to hang out before midnight. You deserve someone who wants to spend time with you just as much as you do with them. You deserve someone who insists on paying for your ice cream. You deserve someone who won't deceive you. You deserve someone who is straightforward. You deserve attention. You deserve affection. You deserve a partnership that is mutual, not one-sided. You deserve to be chased.

You are better than 3 a.m. “Hey" texts. You are better than a night spent watching a movie just to fool around. You are better than trying to decode his vague messages. You are better than his shadiness. You are better than mind games. You are better than being ignored.

If you have to chase him, he's not worth it. Don't settle for someone who makes you beg for his attention. If he is genuinely interested in getting to know you, he will put in the effort. A relationship where your feelings are reciprocated is far more rewarding than one where you constantly feel like you have to drag him along.

Change your mentality. Become more independent. Be confident, be bold. Find happiness in being alone. Don't waste your time pathetically chasing after someone who doesn't feel the same, but doesn't have the heart or the courage to tell you so. Your self-confidence and positivity will make you radiant, and eventually, you will attract the kind of guy who is mature enough to not mess with your head.

Cover Image Credit: weheartit.com
Rachel Schier
Rachel Schier Mar 7, 2016
At Rutgers University

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Newsflash! It's Time For Everybody To Love Everybody

Come on, people, get it together.

Joy Pauline
Joy Pauline Apr 17, 2019
299
views

I, personally, think it's time for everybody to just start loving each other. Now listen, this doesn't mean you need to actually love everyone, but at least accept them. Acceptance is the closest thing we are gonna get to loving each other.

Let me tell you a little something: politics at the moment are very messy. No matter which side it is, it's messy. There is no denying that. If you try to deny that, then good for you, you're not helping anybody. If you really want some change, you need to start being the bigger person. Change isn't about who can yell about something louder or who has the "better" argument, it's about being respectful.

Just because someone has an opposing view does not mean you need to yell at them. Does yelling solve anything ever? Maybe temporarily, like for 2 minutes, but that's about as long as you're gonna get. There's absolutely no need to indirectly say something about certain individuals on social media. Yes, there is freedom of speech, but everybody should keep in mind why they have that right and why they still have it.

I do not understand why it is so hard to be respectful of one another. If someone goes after another person talking about how absolutely terrible it is of them thinking something should be illegal, the person who's being yelled at should respectfully ignore the other individual's disrespectful remarks. If the individual does not stop, then they are not aware that they are making no difference in the world.

What I'm trying to get at here is that in order to love each other, we really need to accept all our differences. If we really want change we need to go right to the sources, not just yell at each other from across the street. If everyone learned to accept each other, life would be a whole lot easier. Is this ever going to happen? Of course not. This is the solution though, whether you think so or not.

Joy Pauline
Joy Pauline Apr 17, 2019
At College of Charleston

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