I Don't Have To Change To Fit Society's Standard

I Don't Have To Change To Fit Society's Standard

An open letter about loving yourself

You are beautiful right now, the way you are. Now that we've established that we should know that throughout history and the world, beauty has been defined in various different ways and has always been associated with physical appearance. For example, in 1870 someone who was rather overweight was considered beautiful and attractive. In the Kayan tribe near Thailand having a significantly long neck is considered beautiful. Today in America and most of Europe being considerably skinny is deemed beautiful. Therefore, we must understand that each of us is beautiful in our own way.

Keeping this in mind, we can see how there is no set characteristic on how you have to look to be beautiful. Skinny can be beautiful and so can a little weight; black skin can be beautiful and so can white skin.

This is where many will advocate that because there is no true standard for beauty you don't have to change the way you look to fit your society's standards of beauty. In other words: you must love the way you are, you don't have to change.

In a way I agree with this. However, it doesn't really matter what I think. Let's look at the facts.

Both underweight and obese people compose a large number of people in the United States. In 2010, 1.7 percent of US adults 20 years or older was underweight. It might not seem like much, but that is roughly around 37 million people (almost the population of California). Obesity is more prevalent and approximately 68 percent of the US adult population is obese or overweight. That's two out of every three adults in the US population!

Both being underweight and obese can lead to serious and sometimes fatal diseases in the future. Being underweight has been associated with osteoporosis, anaemia, and being more likely to acquire an infection; similarly, being obese has been associated with coronary heart disease, stroke and type 2 diabetes.

Yet we continue to tell people that loving themselves means not changing.

The reality is that loving yourself means taking care of yourself. If a family member or close friend was doing something they liked, but you know is damaging them, wouldn't you stop them? Then in the same way you must love yourself enough to care about your health.

It's not about fitting someone's standard of beauty or doing what society wants us to do. It's about you loving yourself enough to take care of your body and your future.I tell you this because just as someone showed me that loving myself meant taking care of myself I want for you to understand that as well. It's not easy, but it's worth it.

Cover Image Credit: Medic Art Travel

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I Blame My Dad For My High Expectations

Dad, it's all your fault.

I always tell my dad that no matter who I date, he's always my number one guy. Sometimes I say it as more of a routine thing. However, the meaning behind it is all too real. For as long as I can remember my dad has been my one true love, and it's going to be hard to find someone who can top him.

My dad loves me when I am difficult. He knows how to keep the perfect distance on the days when I'm in a mood, how to hold me on the days that are tough, and how to stand by me on the days that are good.

He listens to me rant for hours over people, my days at school, or the episode of 'Grey's Anatomy' I watched that night and never once loses interest.

He picks on me about my hair, outfit, shoes, and everything else after spending hours to get ready only to end by telling me, “You look good." And I know he means it.

He holds the door for me, carries my bags for me, and always buys my food. He goes out of his way to make me smile when he sees that I'm upset. He calls me randomly during the day to see how I'm doing and how my day is going and drops everything to answer the phone when I call.

When it comes to other people, my dad has a heart of gold. He will do anything for anyone, even his worst enemy. He will smile at strangers and compliment people he barely knows. He will strike up a conversation with anyone, even if it means going way out of his way, and he will always put himself last.

My dad also knows when to give tough love. He knows how to make me respect him without having to ask for it or enforce it. He knows how to make me want to be a better person just to make him proud. He has molded me into who I am today without ever pushing me too hard. He knew the exact times I needed to be reminded who I was.

Dad, you have my respect, trust, but most of all my heart. You have impacted my life most of all, and for that, I can never repay you. Without you, I wouldn't know what I to look for when I finally begin to search for who I want to spend the rest of my life with, but it might take some time to find someone who measures up to you.

To my future husband, I'm sorry. You have some huge shoes to fill, and most of all, I hope you can cook.

Cover Image Credit: Logan Photography

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5 Tips To Help You Feel Better If You're Sick

A few helpful tips if there's a bug going around.


Not to brag, but I don't get sick very often, maybe once a year. When I do find myself a little under the weather, there's a few things I like to do for a faster recovery. I have no idea if any of these are 100% accurate, but I'd like to think they do. None of these will immediately make you feel better, but they'll help quicken the process.

Drink lots of water.

This one is a no-brainer, but it can be hard to do sometimes. I know when I'm sick, I definitely don't think about it. Water can help flush toxins out of your body, makes you hydrated, and can help you feel more awake and energized! If you're not a huge water drinker like I am, Tea also helps.

Stay home.

If you're sick, it's honestly better if you just take a day off and focus on feeling better. If you're worried about going to school or work, it's better that you don't spread anything. Let me just say, I'm fairly certain the last time I caught something was because someone behind me in a class was coughing through the entire lecture.


This one goes with the last point, but sleeping will help your immune system fight off any infections. It's good to take some time off and get any extra sleep you can.

Clean everything.

I like to wash all of my clothes and bed sheet, because they're what I wear and touch the most, especially my pillow cases. This will help get rid of some germs and stop them from spreading. It's also good to disinfect anything you touch often, like doorknobs and table surfaces.

Take medicine.

This one also sounds like a no brainer, but seriously if you expect to feel better soon you should be taking some sort of medicine. At the very least, it'll help with your symptoms, so you're not couching or sneezing every couple minutes.

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