Sometimes caring too much isn't enough

If He Doesn’t Care About You As Much As You Care About Him, Get Out Of The Relationship

I looked at him like he was the sun but he saw me as just another, dull, faded star that didn't really catch his eye.

228
views

Realizing that someone doesn't care about you the way you care about them is one of the most heartbreaking moments I have ever experienced.

I thought that he was going to be the person that I could turn to in bad times or share the good times with, but it doesn't always work out that way. I looked at him like he was the sun but he saw me as just another, dull, faded star that doesn't really catch anyone's eye.

It's one of the worst things I've done to myself. I tried to get a relationship to work for almost four months. In the beginning, it was like magic. We talked for hours on end, spent time together, and never went through any awkward phases, but one-day things just changed. I didn't want to accept the change, so I tried to ignore it. I tried to get used to whatever was going between us, even though it was tearing me apart.

It took me almost two months to realize that I was trying to give my all to a guy who didn't even blink twice when I was around. No matter how hard you try, things aren't going to happen if they weren't meant to. I'll never know what he wanted out of our relationship, or lack thereof, and I think that's what hurts the most.

I'll never know if he felt the way that I did when we were together, or if I was just another person to keep him entertained for the summer. I just wish I got a proper goodbye, maybe then I wouldn't have wasted so many hours crying over him when in reality he didn't deserve it.

Going through this isn't easy, especially if you have to go through it alone. I tried to make it without talking to anyone about it. I figured if I kept it in, it would go away and I'd be able to live in peace, but honestly, it made it worse. It took me two months and breaking down while driving home to talk to someone.

Once I was finally able to let it go, I realized so much. I realized that I'm worth more than crying over someone who didn't care. That I had so many people around me who loved me and would do anything to make sure I was happy, but I had ignored them because I was so worried about what some guy thought about me. Don't base your worth on what someone else says about you, because in the end, it'll tear you apart.

My one regret is caring about him more than he'll ever care about me. I spent so much time worrying about him and making sure that he was okay that I never realized I was the one driving the relationship. If I took a step back earlier, I wouldn't be realizing, four months later, that it wasn't supposed to go on as long as it did. It was supposed to be fun and then end.

I've finally decided it's easier to let him go and to stop holding onto a strand of hope that wasn't there. If you're going through this, I promise it's easier to just let go. If they come back, then they'll come back and things will be great, but if they stay gone, let them. They don't deserve to know how amazing you truly are.

Popular Right Now

Why You Should Stop Chasing Him

You deserve better.
28496
views

They say “the thrill of the chase" makes someone more enticing. There's just something about wanting something you can't have that drives you crazy (in a good way). There is never a dull moment. Pursuing him is a challenge. Nothing comes easily. What's the fun in that anyway?

I'm going to tell you this: stop chasing him. Stop forgiving him when he forgets to answer your text messages and phone calls. Stop being the one to always make plans. Stop letting him bail on you. Stop waiting around for him. Stop being lied to. Stop making excuses when he doesn't make time for you. There is a difference between someone who is “hard to get" and a flat out jerk who doesn't give you the time of day. Stop letting him use you.

You deserve to be with someone who makes you fall asleep every night in the middle of texting him because neither of you want the conversation to end. You deserve someone who plans dates for the two of you. You deserve someone who asks you to hang out before midnight. You deserve someone who wants to spend time with you just as much as you do with them. You deserve someone who insists on paying for your ice cream. You deserve someone who won't deceive you. You deserve someone who is straightforward. You deserve attention. You deserve affection. You deserve a partnership that is mutual, not one-sided. You deserve to be chased.

You are better than 3 a.m. “Hey" texts. You are better than a night spent watching a movie just to fool around. You are better than trying to decode his vague messages. You are better than his shadiness. You are better than mind games. You are better than being ignored.

If you have to chase him, he's not worth it. Don't settle for someone who makes you beg for his attention. If he is genuinely interested in getting to know you, he will put in the effort. A relationship where your feelings are reciprocated is far more rewarding than one where you constantly feel like you have to drag him along.

Change your mentality. Become more independent. Be confident, be bold. Find happiness in being alone. Don't waste your time pathetically chasing after someone who doesn't feel the same, but doesn't have the heart or the courage to tell you so. Your self-confidence and positivity will make you radiant, and eventually, you will attract the kind of guy who is mature enough to not mess with your head.

Cover Image Credit: weheartit.com

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

The Easiest Way To Get Over A Breakup

Laying in your pajamas is not going to fix everything.

9
views

Breakups suck. There is no other way to say it. But... the good thing about breakups is that they can be seen as a good thing rather than a bad thing. I think the first step to getting over a breakup is to take time to grieve. Your life is going to be different. A whole person is removed from your life. Removed from your routine.

It's OK to take a day to be sad.

I usually take one to two days to be sad and eat a lot of food. You can't just skip over the loss and think that you will recover. You can't do that. Take your two or so days to be sad. No longer than a week. Don't wallow in your dirty, crumb covered sheets.

Once you have taken your grieving time, get your butt up.

Take a shower and leave your house. Put on your favorite outfit and do whatever you need to to make yourself feel better. Go do something. It can be something as small as getting a coffee or walking with friends. Do something with people. Don't become a recluse and isolate yourself.

Do not post on social media.

It is SO tempting to tweet about how sad you are or post a sad snap but don't. Don't let your ex have that much power over you. Don't give them the satisfaction of how sad you are without them. They are going to move on, so you should too. You should also mute them or unfollow your ex. There is no reason to get upset every time you open your phone and see their face. It's not "childish" or "petty" it's smart.

You have to put yourself first and be selfish at this time.

Once you allow yourself to climb out of your dark hole of pity, jump back into life. Keep your chin up and keep going. The best way to "win" in the breakup is to be happy and move on without them. You may fall, you will get random slip-ups of sadness, but you will be OK. Take what you have learned in the relationship and remember that part. Notice what worked and what didn't.

You are fine, it's just a breakup not the end of the world. You got this.

Related Content

Facebook Comments