I really like birds, right? Birds are really interesting animals, are they not? Right, Ok, let me back up. I know that was weird intro but I mean, you're literally about to read a poem I wrote about a bird.
"You wrote a poem...about a bird?"
Well, when you put it that way, no, but still, yes. Well, anyway, read it first, and then I'll explain.
Cardinal
I saw a cardinal and I thought of you.
What am I supposed to do?
There's no conflicting thoughts
No contradicting feelings.
This is so freeing.
This Cardinal will fly away and
I wish it well on its journey.
Just as I'll wish you well.
But like the Cardinal, once it
Flies away, so will my thoughts of you.
I won't look back, I won't hold on.
Because like the red breasted bird I have come to love, I'm moving forward.
And goddamn does it feel so right
To spread my wings and fly away from
All of this.
Goddamn this is freeing.
I'm finally free.
Does it make sense? No, well Ok, I'll explain. Why am I wishing a bird well on it's life and why do I feel so overly free from watching a bird? Well, in short, there's so much more to it than that. Remember when I said I love birds? I mean, cardinals are my favorite bird, I have a giant one tattooed on my thigh.
The cardinal in this poem represents my past self. The kid who I was growing up with every problem, quirk and likable quality I had. See, I used to have a problem with how I used to be, with my past. That sounds so dramatic and it's not supposed to be. Just a lot of internal conflict that at that time in my life I struggled with. Now, I have moved past that, and I have move forward from it. That's why I said I am moving forward. I don't hold on to my past like I once did. I don't cling to every bad thing that once happened. I move forward and carry on with my life. I have been able to leave some of the worst parts about myself behind, and I'm shedding the last bits of those now as i navigate through my twenties. I'm finally becoming happy with myself as a person and working to become a better person everyday. That feels so freeing to me, to be able to become a better person and not be held down by my former self.
