Buy Or Sell: Offseason Narratives

Buy Or Sell: Offseason Narratives

Sorting out the nonsense of the slow season

The NFL has grown too popular to stop for anything, even when nothing is going on. The news cycle spins on through the slow months of May, June, and July, pulling fans in by making mountains out of molehills on the daily. Offseason tropes are recycled again and again. In all reality, the tidbits that come out during the dull period of OTA’s and Minicamps are a poor predictor of anything that will happen come the regular season. Remember how the Eagles and Colts were Super Bowl Contenders last August?

Here we’ll try to sort through the nonsense of the offseason and use the litmus test between fact and fallacy.

Sam Bradford will start for the Eagles at Quarterback

Rookie quarterbacks rarely have the luxury of sitting and learning behind an established starter anymore; they tend to be thrown into the fire right away from week one. Even when teams say they plan to redshirt their draft pick, like the Raiders and Jaguars in 2014, the collective pressure of the fanbase, ownership, and the poor play of whatever veteran they are rolling with usually put such good intentions to waist. However, the Eagles situation is a little different. Bradford isn’t a journeyman like Chad Henne or Matt Schaub; he’s a mid-level starter that’s being paid $18 million per year, and more importantly, the team is behind him. For as much as there is to say about the drama with the Eagles, the front office seems to have a common plan in mind.

Verdict: Buy

Fitzpatrick will holdout from the Jets into Training Camp

Under the tutelage of old friend Chan Gailey, career stopgap Ryan Fitzpatrick experienced a career year, vaulting the Jets into the unfamiliar territory of a winning record and within a blown last game of the playoffs. Yet, the Jets are in a tricky situation with their quarterbacks new contract as his limited physical talents and shaky career history make it hard to justify paying him what can now be described as Ryan Tannehill level money. I’m no longer buying that this will last much longer. No side has anything to gain from this standoff going any longer outside of spite. The Jets are not going to jeopardize a win-now season by putting Geno Smith under center and Fitzpatrick doesn’t have any other options barring a training camp injury.

Verdict: Sell

The improved Jaguars will make the playoffs

Lately, a few of the perennial doormats of the NFL, like the aforementioned Raiders and Jaguars, have finally shown signs of encouragement thanks to finally locating their franchise quarterbacks through the draft. The Jaguars in particular have received a lot of buzz after a slew of high profile offseason acquisitions. They doled out big money for Super Bowl Hero Malik Jackson, as well as adding new starters like Chris Ivory and Prince Amukamara. Then, they essentially added three first round talents on defense in Jalen Ramsey, Myles Jack, and last years pick, Dante Fowler. As exciting as this is, they will have to overcome a new look Texans offense and Andrew Luck’s Colts to win the division, or else win eleven plus games to secure a wild card berth. That’s as many games as this team has won in the past three seasons.

Verdict: Sell

Brady will fight back to remove suspension

The Deflategate storyline somehow found a way to live on into the 2016 Offseason after dragging out through the summer months last year as well. After the Supreme Court ruled that Goodell had the authority to enforce such punishments in his own league, Brady’s four game suspension from last offseason was reinstated. Even though we’ll hear about the future Hall of Famer excausting all resources available, it’s highly unlikely that the NFL will budge as they need to keep this case as precedent. Patriots fans, prepare for a sneak peek at life after Brady when heir apparent Jimmy Garoppolo steps under center for Week One.

Verdict: Sell

Raiders relocate to Las Vegas

After losing out in the Los Angeles sweepstakes earlier this offseason, the Raiders front office has been openly lobbying to get out of town, with the latest destination of Las Vegas. It makes sense for the team to look for a new home; they play on a literal remade baseball field. The issue of gambling, sin, and the like is blown wildly out of proportion regarding the city. The NFL is so popular that these things are going to be prevalent wherever a team is.

Verdict: Buy

Broncos should be worried about Quarterback

It’s a rare thing for a defending Super Bowl Champion to go into the offseason with so many question marks at the most important position in sports. On the other hand, it’s just as rare of a thing for a team to make it to the Super Bowl with replacement level play from its quarterback. Peyton Manning was a competitive disadvantage last season due to his substandard arm strength and lesser accuracy. Brock Osweiler was completely inept at moving the football outside of short stretches. Even though the team drafted Paxton Lynch in the first round, he won’t be ready to start right away. Mark Sanchez is far better than he is portrayed in the media. He provided quality play in spot starts in his time under the Eagles. If we’re being honest, there isn’t much of a difference between him and their options last season.

Verdict: Sell

Moneyball, Sashi Brown, and The Browns Revival

As much as people like to make jokes about the Browns new moneyball philosophy, it is based on sound principles and building through the draft. Essentially, the team will try to accumulate as many draft picks as possible based on the potentially accurate belief that teams aren’t as good at scouting as they believe and it is most beneficial to take as many shots as possible. Hue Jackson appears to be a promising coach, and the front office sounds like they are on the same page. Even when RGIII crashes and burns this season, there is good reason to believe that things are finally turning around in Believeland.

Verdict: Buy

Cover Image Credit: Philly Mag: Jeff Fusco
Cover Image Credit: Diamond Images

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To The Girl Struggling With Her Body Image

It's not about the size of your jeans, but the size of your heart, soul, and spirit.


To the girl struggling with her body image,

You are more than the number on the scale. You are more than the number on your jeans and dresses. You are way more than the number of pounds you've gained or lost in whatever amount of time.

Weight is defined as the quantity of matter contained by a body or object. Weight does not define your self-worth, ambition or potential.

So many girls strive for validation through the various numbers associated with body image and it's really so sad seeing such beautiful, incredible women become discouraged over a few numbers that don't measure anything of true significance.

Yes, it is important to live a healthy lifestyle. Yes, it is important to take care of yourself. However, taking care of yourself includes your mental health as well. Neglecting either your mental or physical health will inflict problems on the other. It's very easy to get caught up in the idea that you're too heavy or too thin, which results in you possibly mistreating your body in some way.

Your body is your special, beautiful temple. It harbors all of your thoughts, feelings, characteristics, and ideas. Without it, you wouldn't be you. If you so wish to change it in a healthy way, then, by all means, go ahead. With that being said, don't make changes to impress or please someone else. You are the only person who is in charge of your body. No one else has the right to tell you whether or not your body is good enough. If you don't satisfy their standards, then you don't need that sort of negative influence in your life. That sort of manipulation and control is extremely unhealthy in its own regard.

Do not hold back on things you love or want to do because of how you interpret your body. You are enough. You are more than enough. You are more than your exterior. You are your inner being, your spirit. A smile and confidence are the most beautiful things you can wear.

It's not about the size of your jeans. It's about the size of your mind and heart. Embrace your body, observe and adore every curve, bone and stretch mark. Wear what makes you feel happy and comfortable in your own skin. Do your hair and makeup (or don't do either) to your heart's desire. Wear the crop top you've been eyeing up in that store window. Want a bikini body? Put a bikini on your body, simple.

So, as hard as it may seem sometimes, understand that the number on the scale doesn't measure the amount or significance of your contributions to this world. Just because that dress doesn't fit you like you had hoped doesn't mean that you're any less of a person.

Love your body, and your body will love you right back.

Cover Image Credit: Lauren Margliotti

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5 Tasks The Detroit Pistons Must Do To Change The 8th-Seed Stigma

After speaking with my lawyer, blackmailing Tom Gores into selling the team is off the table.


The Detroit Pistons returned to the NBA playoffs following a three-year hiatus. Unfortunately, the newest acquisitions to the coaching staff and roster weren't enough to change the narrative of Detroit Pistons basketball and first-round playoff sweeps. Milwaukee dominated the Pistons into a third-consecutive first-round playoff exit since 2009. What can the new titleholders of the NBA consecutive playoff game loss record do to revitalize their early 2000s reign as tenacious contenders within NBA's Eastern Conference?

1. Don't trade Andre Drummond

With the 9th pick in the first round of the 2012 NBA Draft, the Detroit Pistons selected Andre Drummond from the University of Connecticut. Throughout Drummond's six years in the NBA, he continues to adapt, learn, and overcome the adversity surrounding his athleticism and play-style.

The 2018-2019 NBA season was arguably best offensive and defensive season for the 25-year-old center. Trading the three-time NBA total rebound champion that led the league in defensive win shares the past two years is not the answer to our problems.

2. DEFINITELY (and I can't stress that enough) trade Jon Leuer

Jon Leuer received a four year, 24 million dollar contract in 2016 under the management of Stan Van Gundy. As Pistons fans suffering slowly comes to an end, we still have an opportunity to trade Leuer to acquire a player or draft picks that are basically guaranteed to prove more beneficial than Leuer's inconsistent run as a backup power forward.

The Detroit Pistons trading for Thon Maker mid-season was the nail in the coffin for Leuer's run as a Piston, finishing the season averaging 3.8 points, 2.4 rebounds throughout 41 games. We're already paying Josh Smith $5.3 million to sit at home and watch us get swept in the playoffs, we don't Jon Leuer sitting on the bench doing the same thing.

3. Acquire size, strength and defense on the wings

Whether it's in the NBA Draft, a trade (hopefully involving Jon Leuer) or even a free agency signing this off-season, the Pistons desperately need to establish depth of wing players. Currently, the Pistons don't have a single small forward on the team.

The Pistons current depth chart (considering we do not re-sign any expiring contracts) is made up of a single point guard, five shooting guards, three power forwards and one center. A wise man once advised the Pistons to use their size and strength to "form a fuckin' wall." Without small forwards, forming a wall isn't an option and mismatches will be an easy exploit for larger teams.

4. Weigh every option with the 15th draft pick

Due to our past drafting history, it's crucial for the front office and coaching staff to weigh every option before we use our 15th overall draft pick. It's common knowledge Detroit has struggled when it's come to the NBA Draft. The narrative began after skipping over talents like Carmelo Anthony, Dwayne Wade, and Chris Bosh in 2003 and most recently with Donovan Mitchell, Devin Booker, and Giannis Antetokounmpo in recent drafts.

Trading the pick away, trading down in the draft, even trading up in the draft must all be considered. Shopping the draft pick should rank above using it specifically based on our shameful lack of cap space. The Pistons' picks in the 2019 NBA Draft are the only elusive assets Detroit has left until 2020.

5. Find a legal way to force Tom Gores to sell

Since blackmail is illegal, how about brainwash? Tom Gores bought the struggling team in 2011 for $325 million since then not much has changed. He's proved he isn't capable of responsibly owning the team after allowing Stan Van Gundy to take over as head coach and president of basketball operations on top of approving ridiculously priced contracts for players. I'm grateful he gave the Pistons a shot to prove themselves when rumors of relocation circled like vultures but it's time to move on.

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