Joining a sorority is no doubt one of the best things I could have done for myself during my college career. I have made countless friends, participated in a number of valuable philanthropy efforts, and created a professional network unlike anything i could have ever imagined. Being a part of Greek life is nothing like what I thought it would be from watching movies like "The Neighbors" or "The House Bunny," and I think it is great to see Greek organizations working hard to change the way Greek life is initially perceived. But I really wish one thing would go away: black and white photo sets of college kids, featuring a distinctive characteristic that makes them unlike other Greeks. I, in fact,find them rather off putting. They come across as superficial, boastful, and irrelevant. Pulling from the mass of these photo sets I have seen go viral, I've got a little bit of feedback for them.
Telling someone you're bilingual won't instantly change their opinion of your character.
I wish I had a nickel for how many "...But I'm bilingual" signs I have seen. It's great that you're bilingual, it really is. I'm sure it's a very useful skill and you can use your gift of communication to help a lot of people. But if someone is comparing you to Elle Woods, telling them you speak Spanish is only going to make them think that when Enrique tells you not to "Eh --stomp your little last season Prada shoes" at him, you can clap back en Espanol. Hold off and let them wait for you to prove Chutney is the murderer and you save Brooke; let that be the determination of your personality and work ethic.
You also can't dissipate the bad press by telling the world you don't fall into the typical Greek style.
If you're in a fraternity and you like wearing Chubbies, a Comfort Colors frocket T-shirt from your favorite sorority formal, and boat shoes, that's fantastic. Good for you! If you don't, that's also fantastic. You're doing great too! The focus on looking different than what you would imagine your typical Srat-lifer or Frat Daddy look like irritates me. Are you trying to defend what Greek life does, or your sense of style?
If you went Greek, you can't honestly expect your non-Greek friends to never chuckle at you for looking the part. Who cares? My best friend from middle school sends me screenshots of my own pictures from sorority events just to chuckle and say, " I didn't think real people really took these pictures." I think it's funny, because again, it's painfully irrelevant to what Greek life is about. Your ability to branch out and make professional connections for after college is in no way related to what you wore to class during your undergrad.
The same goes for not wearing makeup.
If the common theme hasn't set in yet -- it's awesome if you are in a sorority and you don't wear makeup. That's your decision, it's your face. But in trying to break away from Greek stereotypes by using that as what makes you special, you're putting down girls that are in sororities that do. For the millionth time, who cares? Community impact isn't affected by whether you're content with how you look by just brushing your hair and washing your face, or if you never leave the house without being red carpet ready. You're not better than other Greek women because you aren't super girly, just like they aren't better than you.
Feminism is great, but that's not how it works.
Valuing your education is definitely something to be proud of. But not wanting to get married or wanting to be a lawyer or a C.E.O. is not something that makes you superior to someone that aspires to be a stay-at-home mother. Being a feminist in a sorority is neat, trust me, I know. But feminism is not just about defying gender roles, it's about empowering women to do what ever they want and what they're capable of. Putting a woman down for wanting to be a wife or stay-at-home mother is terrible. Your sorority isn't benefiting any more or any less from you what kind of path you want to take after your undergrad. We are all different beautiful snowflakes and we all have a lot to offer.
Put away the numbers, and put yourself to work.
Show, don't tell. Go out and do things for your philanthropies. No amount of charity is too small, and I'm definitely not putting down any organization for being proud of the success of a philanthropy event. But posting a picture of someone holding a sign that says, "We raised $400 for XYZ charity," won't make people stop and go, "Huh, you know that one organization did that nice thing -- forget everything I ever thought about all of them."
Put the time you're using to defend Greek life online, into going to a soup kitchen, walking dogs at your local animal shelter, literally anything else. The best way to change someone's opinion is showing them they're wrong. As all sorority girls know very well, you are always wearing your letters. People are going to notice that group of guys that always picks up trash on the highway on Sundays, the girls that always bring cookies to the domestic violence shelter or police station, or the 5K that dominates the town and always raises not only amazing amounts of material resources, but awareness as well.
If everyone that made a, "we are not our stereotypes" photo set, took that energy, time, and creativity and put it into something beneficial to people that aren't just Greek, those actions could speak much higher volumes than a viral Facebook post. Granted, the photos reached a lot of people, but putting your best foot forward as a member of a Greek organization is the most effective (if not the only) way to change anyone's opinion. Just ask someone who went through sorority recruitment, or rushed a fraternity late in their college career what changed their mind -- I guarantee you it isn't something that was written on someone's hand in a Facebook picture.
