The early 2000s were filled with mysterious phenomena, spunky trends, and unnecessary scams that bring us all a sense of nostalgia. Looking back incites a combination of cringe and appreciation. The music, clothes, and media were something otherworldly. The thing that I wonder about to this day is who actually ended up winning all of the cool ass contests where you got to hang out with your favorite celebrity for a day in Hollywood.
Out of all the sugary snacks I consumed and numbers I entered into the computer, I never heard back! I hope that whoever went has some Polaroid pictures because they are legendary.
1. Those mysterious contests nobody ever seemed to win
The amount of Go-Gurts I consumed for this shit was pointless.
2. Low-waisted jeans
Who ever thought this was a good idea?
These boys were THE SHIT. I have nothing against Heely's, I loved mine. However, EVERY place you could possibly wear them banned them! If you couldn't wear them to school, the grocery store, or park, where else would you show off your speedy kicks?
4. Michelle Obama taking our cafeteria cookies
The cookies in the middle school cafeteria probably would have caused a lot more obesity had they been left there, but I'm still kinda mad about it.
Sooooooo it's texting between two Nintendo DS's, but you have to be in the same room? I swear that was the start of people being more into virtual communication than verbal.
I had the most neon pair of Osirises ever...who told me that was a good idea?
7. Pencil boxes
When you went back to school shopping, you'd pick out your favorite color pencil box. But THEN you had to buy enough pencils, pens, markers, colored pencils, and crayons to fill it. But your teachers had all of that, so what was the point?
8. Hard headbands
These things didn't keep my hair out of my face for shit. They slid right out and always gave me a headache.
9. Duct tape EVERYTHING
If you didn't make duct tape pens, wallets, or even clothes...good for you because you probably spent your time better than I did.
10. Friendship bracelets
You had a gallon Ziploc bag FULL of colorful string and beads to make bracelets with whoever was your BFF that month. Talk about leaving people out! :(
11. Wearing tank tops over t-shirts
Who decided that layering two completely different colors or patterns was in style? What a waste of money and laundry.
The first illegal thing we all did...download music.
13. Picnik pictures
So much time was wasted editing pictures to be even more cringe than they already were.
14. Silly bandz
If you were that girl that wore them up to your elbow, you were the shit. But where are they now? Your reign as baddest b*tch definitely didn't last long.
15. Computer games
The amount of hours I spent playing those CD computer games that I never finished makes me wonder if anyone ever beat them, or if they were designed to give me stress and impatience at an early age.
16. Being required to play the recorder
A skill nobody ever needs...anywhere...ever.
17. Scholastic book fairs
Let's be real, you ended up buying the poster with a dog on it.
The government was testing out some population control tactics with this danger-inducing shit.
19. Straightening your curly hair just to crimp it
Crimped hair literally looks like kinky ramen noodles. We fried our hair for no reason.
Who decided a short-sleeve sweater that is cropped and barely keeps you warm would be necessary? I think I only wore them to cover my shoulders in school because I clearly was such a sleaze for wearing tank tops at the age of 10.
I definitely neglected my own REAL LIFE dog so that my virtual puppies weren't "famished" or "parched".
I was definitely a victim of the scams of the early 2000s, but I honestly have no regrets. Between the fashion fads, the "huge leaps" in technology, and the fangirl culture over Disney Channel characters, I became who I am.