Recently, my youngest brother got it into is head that he wanted to play hockey and by God, he's driven my family and I crazy by asking us to help, but he's learning. He's a little late with starting to learn a sport that many people master by his age, especially if they plan on going to the NHL. Whenever I was home for break, no matter how short, my brother would ask me to take him to open ice rink at our local LA Kings ice rink so he can skate and practice. It was always grudgingly that I took him because it was cold in the ice rink and he would skate for the whole two and a half-something hours. He was relentless though. He skated and skated and skated and even saved up some money to buy his own second-hand hockey gear. After weeks and months of saving and accumulating the right equipment, he became just a tiny bit better and even tried out for a league. Unfortunately, he didn't make it because he still had a lot more to learn but he didn't give up. Eventually my dad got in on it, and helped him buy more gear and signed him up for classes and they went. I haven't taken my brother to hockey practice or open ice rink time, so I haven't seen much of his improvement.

As I'm writing this, though, my dad fell and hurt himself bad enough to call my mom for her and I to go pick him up. Once we arrived at the ice rink, my dad got in the car and my mom said she's taking him to the ER, and I was to stay with my brother until he finished his practice. I'm currently watching about a dozen people skate around the rink and laugh if they fall, but I'm paying no attention to them as I carefully watch my brother. At first, he was just skating around, I could tell concerned about our dad, but then once he saw me sitting on the benches waiting for him, he began to continue with his drills my dad and him have set up for themselves. I swear the biggest smile crossed my face when I saw him skate fast and hard across the ice and do a quick turn so he could skate backwards and attempt a cross over. When he skated by me, his face was red and sweaty and he looked absolutely exhausted, but he kept going. He kept circling around the rink, as fast as he can and turning on a dime and practicing his cross over. I've watched him fall twice but he gets up and keeps going from where he left off.

I found myself mumbling under my breath saying, "Come on, make the turn, cross one foot over the other, get up, keep going, show these chumps what you can do." I can see how much he's improved in the last few months and how much determination he has. I've found that I have become the proud older sister that will cheer and call other people "chumps" for my little brother who is so determined to be a hockey player. I've come to the realization that I have become the embarrassing older sister who will coddle her younger brothers just because I'm so proud of them or because I care about them so much. I have become the sisterly version of my mother.

I have always said that I will protect my brothers until I'm pink in the face. I have always been the over protective sister and always say that no one can tease or hurt my brothers but me. I'm the sister, that's my job. Now I've become the sisterly version of my mother where, I not only want to protect my brothers, but I want to embarrass them with hugs and kisses on the cheeks and reprimand them when they're being bad. I'm proud of what they can do or what they've accomplished, I cry for them when something they wanted didn't go right, and I want to be their number one fan. I know I can never be because my mom will fight me on that one, but I can still try.

I think that's what it means to be an older sibling. Whether it's for sisters or brothers, it means growing up and seeing how proud you are of your younger siblings and realizing that it takes more than just being over protective. It means embarrassing them as much as you can because you think it's funny and you know no one else will besides your parents. It's tearing up a little when you watch them graduate high school or move in to their college dorm. Being the older sibling, you get used to watching out for your younger siblings and taking care of them when your parents aren't around. You don't realize how much you actually act as a step in parent for your younger siblings until you're all grown up and you want to do more for them than just fighting off schoolyard bullies.