Why does the word "single" have a negative connotation attached to it? I'm 20 years old and have never been in a relationship. My family cracks jokes at my expense that I can't keep a man around. Somehow holiday dinner discussions always tend to end up talking about my relationship status. My relationship status shouldn't be anyone's business but my own, but since everyone is so concerned about it, I've decided to embrace it.
Being single in your 20's has its perks. The biggest thing for me is being able to focus on myself. Being in a relationship requires emotional commitments. I can put that same energy into growing into the women I was born to be. My dreams and aspirations are my number one priority and no one can hold me back.
One of the most important life lessons is learning how to love yourself. I believe that being on your own is crucial to making this happen for yourself. How can you expect anyone to love you when you haven't found it in yourself yet. Relationships tend to suffer when putting these high expectations in someone else's lap. I witness friends of mine struggling immensely when dealing with their self-doubts. It is not your partner's responsibility to mend you.
In your 20's, you're still discovering yourselves. A fear of mine is remaining stagnant. I possess many passions that bring me a sense of happiness that no person has yet brought me. In the meantime, I will focus on the things that do bring me happiness, like traveling. The idea that there's so much of the world I haven't seen with my own eyes brings me excitement. I want to create lasting memories with my friends. Taking pictures of my friends in their element has become a favorite thing of mine.
If I focus on bettering myself, I believe I will attract positive energies. It is important to remember that your happiness comes first. I used to have this mentality that I needed someone to feel complete but my mindset has completely changed. Love is a beautiful thing that should not be forced or rushed. There is so much more to life than being in a relationship.
I've witnessed a lot of relationships fail in front of my eyes simply because people don't know how to be alone. There is no right or wrong way, but learning to be independent is apart of adulthood. There isn't always going to be someone there for you no matter how great your friends or relationship may seem. You have to learn how to rely on yourself before anyone else.
Whenever you start actively searching for something, you just can't seem to find it. It's so frustrating because we want things to go our way all of the time, but life happens and plans change. If you plan your life and happiness around someone who decides to leave the next day, then what are you left with? Yourself. That's when a recommended marathon of Taylor Swift break-up anthems come in handy.
Being independent is something learned. Of course, I enjoy other people's company, but not nearly as much as my own. I am proud to say I'm single and content. I don't plan on changing this for a long time.
The point is, love is complicated and messy, but it starts with you and everything else will fall into place.
