How To Tell If You're Depressed Or Just Sad Over A Breakup
Start writing a post
Swoon

How To Tell If You’re Depressed Or Just Sad Over A Breakup

Post-breakup depression can happen to anyone.

327
https://unsplash.com/photos/5XMs6tQ6SWM

Breakups are heartbreaking. Literally. It's as though someone takes your heart and smashes it into pieces. The pain is unbearable and has honestly reverted me from giving my heart out to anyone. I wanted to steer clear of vulnerability, which is a huge aspect of love. It took a while until I could open myself up a pinch to my current boyfriend, and that took a lot of effort on his part to pry me open.

I'm still traumatized.

My breakup devastated me. I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't do anything, but cry, shake, and hurt. I went through a wide range of emotions, even feeling the need for revenge–an emotion I'd never in a million years think I'd feel. My heart, body, and soul were broken, the pain was like no other. This was such a low time in my life that a portion of it, my mind has chosen to conceal from my recollection.

There is a multitude of reasons why breakups are so hard for people to go through. The experience of rejection, loss, failure, play with one's questioned confidence leaving him/her feeling empty. Nevertheless, clinical psychologist Russ Federman claims, "Sadness is a normal part of the range of emotions that humans typically feel."

However, when researching the "brain chemistry of being rejected" and parting from a past partner, there is a difference between depression and sadness. If you can be distracted from the agony of the breakup for a period of time, then you are sad and can easily pick yourself back up. This does not mean that your relationship meant nothing to you. Instead, it reveals that your emotional state will eventually equalize as your hormonal levels do the same. You can come to terms with the fact that your relationship ended for a reason. For the better. Another clinical psychologist Michael Brustein asserts, "But, ultimately, although you're sad, you still have your sense of self-intact and feel lovable—you're able to maintain the hope and belief that there will be somebody else." Grief is a normal reaction to a breakup (and can even last for weeks on end), but if you know there is a silver lining, then this is identified as post-breakup sadness.

Look at "Legally Blonde's" Elle Woods, after the demise of her relationship with Warner Huntington III, she got up, went to Harvard Law school, and realized that she is worth more than the fractured bond.

Nonetheless, after a breakup, one's emotions can fluctuate and drop dramatically as his/her levels of serotonin and dopamine–also known as the happy hormones–decrease. Both these neurotransmitters are associated with depression and, thus, can affect one's emotional and psychological state after a breakup. Depression is "a persistent, long-lasting mental health condition that interferes with daily life" and can surface as one's loss influences negative feelings. Post-breakup depression is linked to notions of hopelessness, worthlessness, loss of interest in relevant activities, alterations to appetite, and depleting energy. When one faces depression, he/she no longer has hope for the future. Psychologist Chloe Carmichael maintains that "When somebody literally abandons you... sometimes the message that we hear is 'I didn't value you enough to have you in my life.' That can be a hit on your self-worth." If you suffer from these impressions, then you have to ensure you don't isolate yourself. This will only make things worse.

Anyone's post-breakup sadness can morph into depression.

In the manner of Elle Woods, laying in in bed, devouring chocolate to soothe her angered soul, and lashing out on friends are symptoms of post-breakup sadness–these are ordinary emotional responses. With the exercise of repeated, positive affirmations, she gained back her positivity and self-esteem. Her faith in herself became a grounded habit.

Yet, as Dr. Brustein intelligibly clarifies, "If you start to feel defective as a result of the breakup — you start judging your entire sense of self-based on the breakup—that's a sign that it's leading to significant distress."

Good thing is, you can always rise up from a breakup, even if you are undergoing post-breakup depression. With professional help, treatment, and guidance, you can regain your faith in yourself and your future, including but not limited to your ensuing lovers.

I'm a huge believer that everything happens for a reason. Each experience molds you into a stronger, more resilient individual; hence, every breakup will elicit an assortment of miserable sentiments, but it's all worth it in the end. This may be impossible for an individual facing depression to acknowledge right this minute, but hopefully one day they will be able to.

I personally recovered from my particular depressive thoughts that I will never find someone else or that there is no prospect for my love life, but I needed crucial assistance to crawl out of my degrading opinions.

For all that, it is possible to recover from post-breakup agony.


Never shy away from receiving help, please call The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.

Report this Content
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

56609
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

36478
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

958332
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

188728
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments