An Apology To My Long-Distance Best Friend

Dear best friend,

Please don’t cry. You know that whenever you cry, I cry. I am writing this to you today because I am sorry. I am sorry that I went off to school hundreds of miles away and left you. I am sorry that I am making other friends and sharing memories with people who aren’t you. I am sorry that we barely talk let alone see each other any more. For these, and so many other reasons, I am sorry.

We met what feels like a lifetime ago, in the gym of a school we don’t attend anymore. We laughed, cried, ran, and cried even more in the hallways of that high school. We shared lunches, stories, sports teams, and teachers. We didn’t care what anyone thought but always tried to impress them. Senior year flew by, but when I look back at it, all of my fondest memories are with you. I wish that summer never would have ended, I wish we didn’t have to go our separate ways. Leaving home was hard, but leaving you was terrible. You know absolutely everything about me, how was I going to live without my second half? I miss you every day. I miss the laughs, the late night cuddle sessions, and your whale of a personality.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my life here and I think leaving our small town was the best decision I ever made. However, the guilt I carry around from leaving you in a place that you hate kills me every day. Whenever we do talk, I can sense your pain and it’s hard for me to help you without being a part of your life, making me feel like the worst best friend ever. I know the pain you go through watching me move on and create new memories without you, but that’s just it, I’m not moving on. Maybe I am from our town and our high school, but I will never move on from you. Every friend I have and will make in my college career will never add up to you. No one will ever be able to handle my sarcasm, let me mock them, or love me for my flaws like you do. Please remember that.

From the moment I met you, I knew that you would be the one standing next to me not only at my wedding, but for the rest of my life. I’m sorry for the memories we have made without each other. I am sorry for the late nights out I’ve spent without you. I’m sorry for the limited communication we have. I’m sorry for the tears that have fallen from your face without me there to wipe them away. I’m sorry that you feel replaced. But, please know that’s not true. I could never replace you without leaving a whole in my heart. I’m sorry that things aren’t the same, but I’m forever grateful for a best friend like you. Now go on and live your life happily, and always know that I’m here to support you. It’s your turn for that.

Love Always,

Your best friend