Dear Athlete,
I am sorry that you are going through something like this. If I can guarantee you one thing: this will test your character. It will make you feel so many different emotions, but you will come out on top. I am not going to tell you to stay optimistic because I know you have way too many people in your ear with that. My advice is simple. Find someone who is on your side and will just listen. For me, this was my athletic trainer. She was the one person who pulled me through and gave me strength when I needed it most.
Growing up, some of my most vivid and dearest memories were at a ball field. I had been a softball player since my bat was bigger than I was. My Papa was a catcher his whole life so, of course, I followed in his footsteps and became a catcher too. I played recreational ball through my town when I was a kid, moved into travel ball, and then eventually played four years of varsity softball. The same way you did, I am sure. My parents used to laugh at me because I was such a girly girl off the field. It would take hours for me to get ready for school, dinner, football tailgates, events with friends, and every other teenage activity you can imagine. I would never leave the house unless every eyelash and curl was perfectly placed. But after a softball game? I can't even tell you how awful I looked. Hair tangled and messy, a streak of dirt across my forehead, my entire front side would be covered in red dirt from diving (I used to take pride in how dirty I was after a game), and I would attend team dinners and my crush's (now boyfriend's) baseball games with no shame at all.
My 8th grade year I got into a collision sliding into home and dislocated my kneecap. Being the stubborn athlete that I was, I cut my recovery time by a couple months, skipped physical therapy, and jumped right back into the game. Dumb mistake. After playing on a team that was very unhealthy for me, I reestablished my drive for success and became a damn good catcher. By the time I started playing in high school I was very competitive. There just wasn't an "easygoing" bone in my body anymore and I played my heart out with every single pitch thrown. Because of wear and tear, my knee cap began to dislocate consistently. It was always bruised, swollen, and painful. By the time my junior year was over, I knew I had to get this fixed. We saw a doctor and, of course, I needed surgery. I knew it was coming for a while, I just didn't want to take the time off .
I loved the game. My heart would feel warm and full when I could see in my Dad's eyes how proud he was of me. My mom would let me cry to her in frustration when I just couldn't get out of my slump. It broke their hearts as bad as it broke mine when I was told I couldn't play my senior season.
Sitting on the bench is hard. It's nice for a while not having to do all those suicides, core training, drills you have done over and over since your first day of high school, and everything you hated about practice. The first game comes and you don't get to hear your name called in your spot in the lineup. You watch someone else in your position. It breaks your heart a little bit more every single game, but you continue through it.
I don't know what year you are, or what position you play. I'm not sure if you have time to come back from your injury, or if you just want to get better. My advice would be to set a goal for yourself. For example: my goal was to be able to go out and take my position one last time on senior night. I reached my goal and ended up playing the whole game that night as well as a couple playoff games.
You can do it. I believe in you. I am sure everyone is giving you advice on how to get better, and I am sure that everyone is telling you that "it could be worse" or "keep your head up kid, you got a lot to be thankful for." Listen to what feels right, follow your heart, and get your body healthy again. It's painful, physically and emotionally straining, but it gets better. You will get better.
Sincerely,
A Fellow Injured Athlete
P.S.: Do your Physical Therapy like you are supposed to because I am almost two years post-surgery and I am still having issues.
