Dear The Last Chapter,
For years, I have been trying to go through life with a lump in my throat and my heart closed off. The reason behind this anxiety and standoffishness is because I was living my life with all the doors of my past still open. There were things left to say and a lot of people that needed to be left behind and there's a thing about allowing your past creep back into your life, it overpowers every move you make and makes you second guess every move you wanted to make.
Living life without closure makes it that much harder to move forward. I cannot be more grateful for the things this chapter has given me, but I also can't live the rest of my life writing the same things over and over, which is why I needed to close the door and put the final period on this chapter. After saying goodbye to the previous most important parts of my life, I truly do feel lighter. I feel a sense of calming because putting closure on that chapter allows a lot of things to come into perspective.
The biggest thing I had to say goodbye to was my first love. Though it wasn't exactly a goodbye, it was more of me allowing myself to say all the things I needed to say. I had told my first love that those feelings will always be there and though I wasn't expecting much back, I allowed myself to let go of those feelings that were holding me back for so long and maybe sometimes that first love may not be the one I end up with, but what I know is that putting those feelings out there made me feel so much better because finally that constant anxiety was lifted.
The door that continued to stay open was making me feel like I wasn't living my life because I still let those parts of my life control what I was trying to do today. As much as I wanted to hold on to all the things that I have gone through the only way to move forward is to let go and that's exactly what I did.
There won't be a day in my life where I won't reflect on things that I have gone through to get me to where I am today because I have always lived with no regret because living a life in regret is one that you are not living. The hardest goodbyes are the ones that mean the most to us and though this chapter was the hardest to close, there are only good things that are awaiting me for the future. I cheer this last chapter for teaching me that love still exists, that heartbreak still and will always suck, and that life is one hundred percent worth living. There is no better life than the one you have right now and living in the past will only make it that much harder to live. So thank you for the memories, but this truly is the sweetest goodbye.
Yours Truly,
The next chapter
