Dear Cat Calling,
We've all been exposed to you - hell, some of us have used you to get attention. What's so alluring about you anyway? Is it the exhilaration of screaming something lewd to a total stranger that you'll probably never run into again or is it the sudden flourish of masculinity that surges through you?
When someone cat calls they assume that it will translate into something kinder and the object of their affections will feel a flush of confidence and feel sexy in their own skin. However, this just isn't the case.
When a woman gets cat called her senses go into overdrive and then become hyper aware of their body. This, of course, isn't the case for all women, but for most women, it's a moment of complete vulnerability. There is no happiness to be had when your body and sense of safety is thwarted by deep voices and over sexualized comments.
There is no pride that swells within us when a man demeans us by yelling across a street or a car or a store to yell that they find us attractive. There's a certain level of aggression kindling under their remarks and we can feel ourselves get smaller and smaller because deep down we know that if they wanted to get closer, wanted to touch us, they could.
They could lay hands on the very body they were admiring and if we were to say no there would be anger and fire and if we're burned we would be blamed for setting the fire in the first place.
You see women will always be at fault for the pain you bring, cat calling. We are told that we should see it as a compliment when in reality it's another moment in life that knocks a woman down from her role as human and she becomes nothing but a walking piece of meat for enjoyment. My skirt is not asking for you to talk about my legs, my breasts are not yours to ogle at, and for the love of everything holy do not tell me to smile!
When we speak up about how cat calling really makes us feel we're demeaned for not being able to take the compliment and another cycle of women being painted as whiny and ungrateful comes full circle. Our daughters watch strong women get knocked down when she walks by men who don't have enough respect for her or themselves to approach her as if she were human. Our daughters grow to think that their beauty only lies in the eyes of a man across the street.
Cat calling...you are ruining what it's like to be a strong, beautiful woman being able to walk her dog across the street without feeling exposed to every set of male eyes that she meets. You are ruining what it's like to walk from a restaurant to the job you work so hard for by men in business suits who see you as an eye candy secretary instead of a businesswoman to work along side them.
We beg you to change and fade into the past.
Sincerely,
Women just trying to get somewhere.
