I’ve been labeled as “shy” for basically my whole life. I can be pretty quiet and keep to myself sometimes, but does that make me shy? Just because I don’t talk to every person I see or know? Sure, it takes me some time to warm up to people, but isn’t that normal? I just go with it, because I’m used to it and it seemed to make sense.

I was voted “Most Shy” in my senior year of high school, but that’s the year I started to not really feel as shy. I had talked to most of my senior class, well, at least the people I grew up with. I was friends with a lot of them for some time but we went our separate directions as the years went on. So, I didn’t really talk to them anymore. Mainly because I didn’t really think there was anything to talk about. How does that make me shy? They didn’t necessarily try to talk to me either, so does that make them shy too? Why try talking to someone whom I don’t find a need or interest to talk to?

I feel like many people avoid talking to someone if there’s nothing to talk about. So I don’t quite understand how doing that labeled me as a shy person. Now, I wouldn’t call myself a social butterfly because I definitely am not. I usually only talk to people if they talk to me first, unless we’re friends or family. Then, I’ll probably talk your ear off. The problem is that I got labeled as shy because people don’t take the time to get to know me. They assume that just because I don’t want to talk to them, I must be shy. When really, I probably just don’t like them or just have nothing to say. That sounds kind of mean, but, everyone is like that at some point, right? At least, I know a lot of people like that. All it takes is trying to get to know someone, and they won’t be so “shy” anymore.

When I get comfortable around someone, I talk a lot. And I might also sing and dance a lot too. Not the good kind, of course. I just like to have a good time listening to some of my favorite music. But, people don’t see that because they don’t think it’s worth their time to try and get to know a shy person. Bringing someone out of their shell is just too much work, I guess. I have seen this kind of situation unfold with many people. Just because someone comes off as quiet or shy, doesn’t mean that it’s their entire personality.

I think as I have realized this, I have subconsciously tried to fight the title of being shy more and more. I don’t take it as an insult, but as a joke. To prove that whoever is saying it really just doesn’t know me or who I am. I know there are some people who come off as shy, and are probably actually shy. But, for many cases, it’s just a matter of comfort levels and getting to know the person. If someone is going to pass me off as shy and not give me the time of day for it, why should I worry about trying to please them? It’s not my job to please everyone and make them feel as though I want to converse with them when I really don’t.

My point is, people are too quick to judge. There is more to me and to everyone than it may seem, and it takes time and effort to learn this. If someone doesn’t want to take the time and effort to get to know you, they aren’t worth your time. Spend time with the people who show a genuine interest in being with you and learning more about you as a person. Don’t worry about the people who only have time to judge you. They’re not important. I have learned that I shouldn’t assume things about myself just because so many people are telling me what I am like. I know what I’m like, after all, I am me. Don’t let others control your self-image, all that matters is what you think of yourself.