Dear Mom, Have I Ever Told You?

Dear Mom, Have I Ever Told You?

You're appreciated.

Dear Mom,

I just wanted to say thank you for being the best role model a girl could ask for. For all those times that I complained about something that seemed like such a big deal at the time, thank you for keeping me sane and assuring me you just want the best for me. Although often times I don't show it, I would be lost without you.

Your constant guidance has taught me many things throughout these years. Without you, I would never know right from wrong. Whether it was as simple as an inappropriate outfit I wore at the age of 16, or as stressful as what I want to do when I grow up, you have always been right there guiding me in the right direction.

Your constant love inspires me. You never fail to cheer me up when I'm sad, or send me an "I love you" text message, just because. When I'm having a bad day, one minute I'm in the best mood ever and the next I'm miserable and for some reason you don't get upset.

I know you will always tell me the truth. Whether I want to hear it or not, you know what's best and you make sure I know that. I know I can always look to you for advice because you will tell me how it is and that's what I love about you.

Thanks for being my biggest fan. Ever since I was a little girl you have been at everything. Every awards ceremony, every sports game, every dance recital and every birthday party. Rain or shine, I know I can count on you to be there and to be honest, that's the best feeling in the world.

You're my "go to." If I have a question involving school, boys, friends, work, a sickness or dinner, you know the answer. They say moms know everything and they're not wrong. I don't know how you do it, but your intelligence amazes me.

Lastly, thank you for being my best friend. I wouldn't be the person I am today without you. I am the luckiest girl in the world to have a mother like you and I wouldn't change it for a thing. Even though we have had our fair share of disagreements, we make up for it with all the good times and memories we share together. I just want you to know, you are the best mom in the whole wide world and I hope someday I am half the woman you are.

Love Always,

Your little girl

Cover Image Credit: Jill Alaimo

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To The Friends Of Sexual Assault Survivors, If You Don't Want to Make It Worse

They trust you. Don't mess it up.

Let's say that one day you are just sitting around playing on your phone. Doing your daily scroll through your preferred social media account. When your friend texts you and says "I need to tell you something."

First, let me help you out, never respond to a female saying are you pregnant. I've done this and put my foot in my mouth. So you say whats up? and they go "last night I was sexually assaulted."

OK, now freeze...

If the next text out of your phone is not "OH MY GOD! ARE YOU OK?" then you've already fucked up.

I'm writing this article so that I can shed some understanding or some light on the situation that has now been presented to you.

Do not ask what happened. Why in the hell are you asking a sexual assault victim to relive one of the most traumatic events of their life? What is wrong with you? You are not an investigator, you are not a judge, and you are NOT a jury. You by no means have the right to ask for the story.

You don't get to know unless they want you to know. There's a fine line between showing you care and badgering someone. So, instead of asking for details your best bet is to just BE THERE FOR THEM and let them know that if they want to talk you are there to listen. But by no means interrogate them for the full story.

If you for some reason don't believe them because you a nosey gossip queen who requires all the facts? Then YOU KEEP YOUR OPINION TO YOURSELF! It is hard enough for victims to come forward as it is without worrying about their friends and family not believing them.

If you take anything away from this article as a best friend, a friend, a family member, a loved one, or even an acquaintance hear me out on this. That person who just told you something that you hopefully cannot fathom knowing what they are going through. They confided in you because they trust you.

So if the next words out of your mouth are not "OH, MY GOD! ARE YOU OK?!?" Then you shut up and you tell them you are unreliable and unworthy human being and you direct them to someone who is better equipped to help them.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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Hard Times Work Out For The Better

I've learned to let go of the unimportant things in life and hold on to the better.

Some days overcoming difficult times in life seem impossible. When one thing goes wrong, it always has one hundred other things to follow. Life seems unfair at times, but really the hard times in our life is what shapes the person we are today. Learning from my past struggles and hardships have made me become the best me I can be.

One of the most difficult times in my life was when my parents got a divorce. I remember I was in fourth grade when my mom sat me down and told me that my dad wouldn't be living with us anymore. At the time I didn't really understand, however later in life was when it got harder. Little did I know that difficult times are only temporary.

Those times were hard for me because I wanted my parents to be together and I wanted things to go back to the way they used to. I didn't see my dad as much which was a big change for me and it would hit me hard sometimes. I wouldn't wish a divorce upon anyone, but looking back at the difficult time, I honestly wouldn't change a thing.

I learned so much from that experience and it shaped who I am today.

Learning to live with divorced parents isn't easy at first, but I got used to it. I learned to not only live without two parents but also learned to love both of my parents equally. It's not about getting more presents during Christmas or getting more birthday money. I've learned it about realizing that there are two wonderful people that love me for who I am.

Not only have I realized how unconditionally they love me, but how much my sisters mean to me as well. Wow. Never thought I would say that. Although my sisters and I fight like cats and dogs, we have become very close during the hard times we have experienced together. Thinking about the days we had to share a room makes me laugh and cherish those memories. I wouldn't have wanted to go through that with anyone else.

I also learned that people make mistakes. I understand that no one is perfect and some things just don't work out. I've learned to accept change and adjust the best I can.

From moving multiple times, I've learned to let go of the unimportant things in life and hold on to the better.

I've learned how to become independent and accomplish many things by myself. Relying on someone else to do everything only backfires in the long run when that person is no longer there.

This is not an article by any means to get people to feel sorry or pity for me, but to know that whether it is divorce or any will only make you stronger! I am thankful for the hardships I have overcome along with the many life lessons they have taught me.

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