Dear Mom, From Your Daughter In College

Dear Mom, From Your Daughter In College

Here are all the things our phone calls aren't long enough to say.
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Dear Mom,

Do you remember when I was three and we would play together?

It was the age of princesses and carpet that was actually lava, and you were the prettiest woman in the whole wide world. Do you remember when I was in high school and the world seemed too big and scary? You would know exactly when to take me on a mother-daughter date and have me laughing about anything and everything, and you were the smartest woman in the whole wide world.

Now, I'm buried in homework and deadlines hours away from you and we don't get to talk as much you want, but you're still the prettiest, smartest woman in the whole wide world.

I'm sorry that I don't call you as much as I should, and you know a lot of what goes on in my world via posts and pictures. Our schedules just seem to never line up so we can have the three-hour conversations about everything like I want to. I know we don't agree on absolutely everything, but I cherish every piece of advice you give me, even though it probably seems like I'm hardly listening.

I know that sometimes we get on each other's nerves, but thank you for putting up with me for all of these years. Thank you for listening to me cry, complain, question things and go on and on about how everything in college is. I know I don't come home as much as I used to, but I think about you all the time. After all, you're my first friend, and therefore, my best friend.

Thank you for celebrating my successes with me, and not downing me too hard for my failures. Thank you for knowing what mistakes I shouldn't make, but letting me make them anyway because you want me to live my life and be my own person. Thank you for knowing when to ask about the boy I've been talking about, and when to stop without any questions. Thank you for letting me be my crazy, weird, sometimes know-it-all self.

Thank you for sitting back and watching me spread my wings and fly. There is no way I could have known how to grow into the woman I am today if I hadn't watched you while I was growing up so I would know what kind of person I should aspire to be. Thank you for being the first (and the best) role model I ever had. You continue to inspire and amaze me every day with all that you do, and all that you are.

I don't know how I got so lucky to have a person in my life like you, but I thank the Lord every night for blessing me with the smartest, prettiest person to be my best friend, my role model, my confidant, my person and most importantly, my mother.

Love,

Your daughter

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.

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Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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12 Interactions Servers HATE As Much As Being Asked If They're Single By Their Customers

Chances are, I'm not actually interested in anything you have to say. What would you like to drink?

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I've worked in a restaurant for about 4 years now, mostly during the summers, but occasionally I will go home on the weekends to pick up a few shifts or see the staff. Working in a restaurant has taught me that I love working with the public, but I also hate working with the public.

You learn patience and you learn to let things go because in the midst of having an 8 top, being double sat, arguing with the kitchen over grill chicken for a salad, and having a customer upset because you forgot to bring them their third side of ranch, something is bound to go wrong.

Chances are unless you've worked in a restaurant before, most of them won't make any sense to you, but here are a few things that servers hate when you ask or talk about and how we actually react versus what we wish we could say.

1. Which is colder? Bottle or draft?

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What I say: "They are actually in the same cooler, so our bottles and drafts are about the same temperature. It's really whichever you prefer."

What I want to say: "I hate when people like you ask this. Honestly, dude, it's hot outside and it's a pretty day and I want a cold beer just as bad as you do. I promise I'm going to bring you the coldest beer I can find. So, bottle or draft?"

2. I want the appetizer to come out before the meal.

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What I say: "Of course. I'll put it in before your order and do everything I can to get it out as soon as possible!"

What I want to say: "Don't we all, but considering you ordered you an appetizer and your meal at the same time and the kitchen is swamped, good luck with that. I'll be sure to bring you appetizer plates and napkins in a few minutes to make you think it will be out soon."

3. What's your favorite thing on the menu?

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What I say: "Oh grilled shrimp for sure and our mac and cheese is amazing, but our sandwiches are good as well! There's not really much you can go wrong with on our menu."

What I want to say: "Honestly, I eat this food all the time and I'm probably going to beg the kitchen to cook me anything that's NOT on this menu as soon as my tables leaves so I'm just going to recommend one of the most expensive items and probably eat chicken tenders when I get off because I have the taste buds on an 8 year old."

4. Can I get a cup of soup? Actually, make it a bowl! I'm really hungry!

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What I say: "Absolutely, our soup is homemade and it really good. You'll definitely be glad you got that bowl."

What I want to say: "Did you know that a cup and a bowl literally hold the same amount of soup but you're paying a dollar more? HAHAHAHA. More tip for me. Thank you, next."

5. Oh, we are going to need lots of ranch. We love ranch. Your ranch is the best. RANCH.

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What I say: "Oh, I'm the same way. I love our ranch and I'll be sure to bring a few out before your meal."

What I want to say: "Did you know our ranch is literally made in 5-gallon buckets and I have no problem being a sarcastic ass and sitting the entire bucket on your table if your talk about our ranch one more time. Or maybe I'll be really mean and accidentally 'forget' to bring you some."

6. I know the owners.  Are they here?

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What I say: "Oh yeah. They are good people! They aren't here right now but I saw them earlier, I'll be sure to mention that you asked about them!"

What I want to say: "Really? Me too. No, they aren't here because they don't really work here, they basically just make money off of people like you and me. Oh, and when I say they were here earlier, they were really just having a beer, not actually working."

7. Your eyelashes are so long! 

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Maybe this one is a little specific to me but I hear it way more than you would think.

What I say: "Awww, thank you so much" *batts eyes*

What I want to say: "Wow, I'm surprised you noticed through the sweat dripping off my brow. I feel forced to do my makeup for every shift because the tips are better when I look cute."

8. Oh honey, you are so pretty.  Do you have a boyfriend?

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What I say: Well thank you and no, I'm single. What can I start you guys with to drink?"

What I want to say: "Thanks a milly but I'm just trying to take your order so I can go stand in the walk-in because it's so hot and no, I do not want you to hook me up with your 30-year-old son who probably lives in your basement. What. Do. You. Want. To. Drink?"

9. What time do you get off?

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What I say: "We normally stop seating at 10 but the bars are open until 2 so I'll be here a little while."

What I want to say: "Are you asking because you want to wait until the last minute to order food or because you want to buy me a drink after because my answers are going to be very different depending but honestly I just want you to get up from my table."

10. Your accent! Where are you from?

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What I say: "I'm actually from here. I grew up about 30 minutes from here."

What I want to say: "I know I sound like a hick but I'm actually from here, you Yank. Maybe I can use my southern belle accent to charm you into leaving me a better tip."

11. You're really tall and you've got some nice legs.

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This one's also pretty specific to me.

What I say: "Haha, yeah", I say awkwardly as I squeeze out a smile.

What I want to say: "Thanks for commenting on my body. Yes, I played basketball. Yes, I lift weights. Yes, my thighs are thick, you should see how chaffed they are from running around this restaurant and waiting on pigs like you. Thank you for making this awkward."

12. Honey, can you wipe this table off for us?

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What I say: "Absolutely, give me just one second to drop this check off and I'll be back to wipe it down."

What I want to say: "Or better yet, you can just sit there in filth for a few minutes since you walked passed the 4 signs that say, "please wait to be seated" and the host herself to seat yourself and I'm not even your server. If you think that table is dirty, you should see the kitchen floor after a Saturday dinner shift. You can wait. And don't you dare ask me for menus and silver wear."

Honestly, servers are some of the sassiest people you will ever meet. They have to deal with rude customers and even worse, they have to deal with co-workers that have to deal with rude customers.

Don't get me wrong, I thoroughly enjoy being a server, it's probably my favorite job ever, but it can be quite the headache sometimes. Occasionally you will meet a customer that is genuinely interested in you but more than likely they are just wasting your time to try and make conversation in hopes to get on your good side or to try and get something for free.

I promise that I will do the very best I can to serve you and give you a pleasant dining experience. I will assure you that as long as you cooperate with me, I will cooperate with you.

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