There is a time and a place for everything, except talking about your ex. There is never a time for that, and the place is definitely not during a relationship. There is nothing that will ruin a relationship more than focusing too much on an ex love (with the exception of co-parenting). Think about what your lover must be imagining upon listening to you converse with youself about your ex. If you want a long lasting relationship, then please, for your own sake, notice the signs!
1. She no longer appreciates long conversations about your childhood
Because you always make it about how, “when you were 18, you thought Helga was the best girl for you. But then Helga broke your heart…and look where you are now—happy as can be. Thanks, Helga.” 18 is far from childhood and what does Helga have to do with her? You’re bitter, please stop talking about Helga.
2. He stops responding to you.
You’re basically having a conversation with yourself about your ex and it is not flattering at all. You don’t notice how uncomfortable he is. Every conversation is about Trevor from junior year at college, Trevor who took your virginity, Trevor who said you’d marry him, the Trevor who broke your heart. Do yourself and your boyfriend a favor and stop thinking about Trevor.
3. She starts to talk about her ex too.
Sometimes it rubs off on others accidentally, but sometimes it’s intentional. If you keep talking about your ex, she’ll talk about hers too, “Oh, how Martin was such a great kisser and so exceptionally romantic—there’s no one like him.” You won’t like that. Don’t get mad just get over your ex.
4. He needs to know why you’re dating him.
“Babe, tell me again, why you chose me out of all the guys who you could be dating right now?” He needs reassurance because he knows that you’re still in love with your ex, and he doesn’t want to leave you if there’s any chance that it’s just a phase. You know it’s not a phase, you know you aren’t ready for another relationship; you’ll never be ready if you can’t let the past go.
5. She tells you that she doesn’t care if Ashley never liked the food at your favorite restaurant.
Ashley doesn’t even like you, why would she like your favorite restaurant? She tried to be nice the first 25 times you mentioned Ashley and Chinese food in the same sentence, but nice doesn’t always work.
6. He starts to think you’re cheating.
You talk about your ex-boyfriend so much that you should be dating him—or, at least, sleeping with him. There’s no other reason why you can’t stop thinking about your ex. Go ahead and tell him, you aren’t cheating, you’re just in love with your ex still.
7. She doesn’t want to go to family game nights
Your family keeps calling her Trish, and Trish isn’t her name. Trish is your ex-girlfriend and everyone knows that. But you talk about Trish so much that no one can forget her. Stop making Trish relevant in our relationship.
8. You're freaking out upon seeing your ex (even from a far distance, even if it turns out to just be a look-a-like).
Their favorite shirt is stitched into your memory and you act as if its almost impossible that others own the exact same shirt.
9. You're always looking to get revenge on your ex.
It's not funny, it's not a turn on, its just weird and unnecessary. Quite frankly, it should be revenge enough that they can't be with you...since you're in a new relationship and all, right?
The signs are all there, next time, I hope you notice them!
