1. "What event do you do for Cross Country?"

Event? Event!? Cross Country event!? You have got to be kidding me! What is wrong with people? Oh that’s right…no one is familiar with the sport of Cross Country. Yes, Cross Country is a sport; a sport that takes place in the fall not the winter or spring. So just in case you did not know, Cross Country has its own season and it entails just one event. Women run a 5k, which means 3.1 miles of pure sweat and joy.

2. "I can't even run one lap around a track, how do you run miles?"

If runners had a dollar for every time they hear this one, every runner would be wealthier than Bill Gates. Runners understand the gruesome sport in which they choose to participate in so hearing that they run more than some can dream is a beautiful phrase of praise, but it gets old real quick. Of course you cannot run more than me; you are not weird enough.

3. "Do you like to run?"

Does anyone really like to run? Yes, actually yes! And that is why runners are some of the oddest humans you could ever encounter. Runners run for fun. Fun! It’s unbelievable that someone could love to run, but the “runners high” is a thing and a glorious one at that. So of course runners complain and hate it in the middle of a workout, but that rewarding moment when the workout has completed is triumphant.

4. "You eat so much, you'd be fat if you stopped running."

Runners eat so much because all they do is run! You try a thirteen-mile day and then try to snack lightly. If you make fun of eating habits of runners you have clearly never competed in the intensity that is long distance events. Thoughts of food are the beacon of light at the end of the sweaty, groggy tunnel.

5. "Do you like running on the treadmill or outside?"

Is that even a question? When pre-season averages 13 miles a day, no one in their right mind would want to be stuck inside on a never ending conveyor belt. To top it off there’s no scenery besides cocky gym boys trying to get “swole" with their bad form.

6. "Could your shorts be any shorter?"

Could your lack of understanding to the sport of running be any more obvious? If running naked were a choice and there would be no chance of chaffing then there would be no question. Sitting in your own musk is the worst feeling atop a day of heavy breathing and the less clothing, the freer you feel. Short shorts are a thing of comfort in a sport where the objective is to feel uncomfortable.

7. "What are those weapons on your shoes?"

Spikes. They are called spikes and they can be the worst weapon of destruction to innocent runner’s legs. They grip the ground and bring runners to record setting times, but destroy any skin that gets too close.