I never thought there would be a day where you would forget who I was. As my great-grandmother you watched me grow up. You cared for me often. One day, I walked into a hospital room and saw you point your finger at me asking, "who is she?" The tears poured down my face. I wanted someone to wake me up from this nightmare. Watching Alzheimer's change your life for the past four years has taught me a lot about loving someone with Alzheimer's.
1. It is no ones fault.
It is not your fault that you do not remember who I am every time I go to see you. Alzheimer's is a brutal disease and you are trying your best every day. I find that I blame myself for you not remembering who I am, or for you mixing me up with someone else. I tell myself, "I should visit more often, maybe then she will always remember me." The fact of the matter is, Alzheimer's is an irreversible disease that is not easily prevented. As a caregiver, you are doing your best and so is the individual who is suffering from Alzheimer's.
2. Visit as often as you can.
You may not always remember who I am and you may not always be having a good day, however it is never wasted time. There will be days when I do not get to visit you any longer and I always want to have something to look back on.
3. There will be good days and there will be bad days.
Alzheimer's has changed the way your brain functions. Some days will be better than other days, but there any day with you is a day I will cherish forever.
4. Listen.
Nothing makes you happier than telling me stories about what you do remember from your past. Listening without interrupting has also given me insight into valuable life lessons that I will carry with me forever.
5. You are not alone.
There are more than 5 million people who have Alzheimer's in the United States. Look into your local Alzheimer's Association for support groups and events to connect with others who are experiencing the same thing.
These past four years have not been easy. I wish you did not have to live with this disease. There are many tears that have been shed and much sadness that has been experienced. At the end of the day, loving someone with Alzheimer's has taught me what I should value in life and that is family. I will love you forever and I will love you always Babcia. You are my role model.
