Elections are coming up Tuesday, November 8, so how better to keep you informed than with a reasons-to-vote Listicle? Firstly, you're welcome. Secondly, strap in. Lastly, the personal is political, so if you genuinely feel attacked at any point in this article, please refer to the many times Donald J. Trump has personally attacked individuals and entire groups of people.
1. You hate people
I know, I get it, we all laughed to ourselves when we first saw that "I'm not racist, I hate everyone equally" sticker in the sixth grade. But guess what, bucko? This is not the sixth grade. Hating people is not cool, as much as Daria seemingly makes it. But if you genuinely hate the majority of people (besides the all powerful able-bodied cisgendered straight white man, of course), Trump is the candidate for you!
2. You think pregnancy is an inconvenience
Well I, personally, wish that your mother had felt that way! But seriously, if you care more about the convenience of a business than the beauty of family, I hope you never have children.
3. You don't respect women
You know, it doesn't really matter what your opinion is on women "as long as you've got a young, beautiful piece of ass". Don't like that last part? Direct quote from Donny JT himself circa 1991. Maybe you'd prefer calling out specific celebrities like Rosie O'Donnell or Angelina Jolie on their looks. Better yet, try having 11 accusations of rape WHILE running for president and ALSO claiming "nobody respects women more than [you]". That's a great look for ya, Donny. I'm not buying it.
4. You hate the gays
The gays. There they go, ruining the rainbow. Marriage equality act? Throw it out the window. But what's worse? The latter of the Trump/Pence ticket signed a bill in 2013 that would put people who applied for same-sex marriage license in jail, including the clerk who agreed to perform the ceremony. He also wanted to divert funding from HIV prevention to gay conversion therapy. Because why not just have one candidate who is awful? Double down for the dream duo of anti-gay rights, while pleading for the gay public's vote!
5. You're an idiot
Maybe you think Trump is a great businessman (despite his many claims for bankruptcy), and you think America should be run like a business (with a pretty fucked up HR department). Maybe you think Hillary is corrupt (see Seth Meyer's comparison here.Maybe you think Hitler gets a bad rap. Either way, if you don't notice the flaws of a Trump presidency, you're an idiot.
