Choosing not to identify as a feminist is a personal choice, but is it an informed choice? The problem I've always encountered with people who are anti-feminist is that they are usually ill-informed. They think that because the word starts with female that women want to rise up above men. Or they think it's a hate group towards men. That is all very much untrue. There may be a few radical feminists, like there are in any group, that use anger and hate to try and get their message across. These individuals are in the minority among feminists. Merriam-Webster dictionary defines feminism as, "The theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes." I'm not really sure how that can be misconstrued, but it happens. Instead of using anger to discuss this topic, let's remedy the situation by looking at the facts.
1. Feminists Hate Men
This is the most common misconception I've ever heard. I'm not sure how a movement for equality can be seen as a hate group, especially since hate crimes aren't even a part of the movement. I'm sure there are some mentally unstable individuals who do crazy things in the name of feminism, but that is not what the movement is. In fact, feminism has started to advocate for male issues as well. One of these issues is that males often do not come forward when they are sexually assaulted because of the way society treats them. Anyone can experience sexual assault at any time. Feminism wants to assure that these people have support when coming forward. A lot of times toxic masculinity conditions males to be afraid about coming forward. This is what feminists hate, not men, but the societal structure that keeps men and women in confined boxes of fear. They both fear that no one will believe them. Men fear that their assault will be belittled because society conditions males to think that any female attention is good attention. Women fear that they'll be blamed for their own assault. Society gives off an implicit message that women who are assaulted by men "asked for it" and men who are assaulted by women "should've wanted it".
2. Feminists Are Destroying Family Values
This one is just ridiculous. Feminists advocate for family value government programs. Feminism is one of the main support groups for things like maternity and paternity leave. They also don't believe in judging women who breast feed in public, which is often times frowned upon by society. Family life is valued. For some reason individuals fear the career woman. They think that a working women will destroy the family structure. Or they think that a career implies that a women does not want a family. This could not be more false. Women and men are perfectly capable of balancing work and family life. For some reason, men have never been questioned on their ability to have both. Another part of feminism is realizing that not everyone wants children. Just because you want children doesn't mean everyone else does, and that's okay. The key thing is allowing other women to make decisions about their own life without judgement.
3. Feminists Don't Believe in Marriage
This is true for some feminists. Some feminists don't want to get married. Or they want to get married and they don't want to take their husbands last name. That's okay. That doesn't mean they're going to pass judgement onto those that do get married. It just means that they don't want to get married themselves because it's something they don't believe in. It's like saying some feminists are ruining Cheetos because they don't like them and choose not to eat them. Cheetos are still available to everyone else. They don't disappear just because some people dislike them. It's simply about choice. You can choose to like something and participate in it or you can choose not to. Judging someone for liking or not liking something is what's truly insane, especially since not all feminists dislike the idea of being married. They just dislike the idea of judging those that choose not to get married. A woman is not defined by her ability to marry and reproduce, but it can be a part of her if she chooses.
4. Feminists Are Fat Lesbians
The problem with this is that fat and lesbian are not stand-alone insults. It's the negative connotation that society puts behind the words that make them insulting. Feminists try to fight against this type of bullying through Intersectional-Feminism. This concept emphasizes the inequality among all individuals and how we can combat it. There is inequality among the races, sexes, and sexuality. Not every feminist is fat. Not every feminist is a lesbian. Not every feminist is a female. That doesn't mean there is anything wrong with these things. It means that using these stereotypes to insult an equal rights movement is immensely ignorant.
