Ah, yes. USA Swimming. The organization that took over your life and made it possible to eat carbs all day, every day. Even though we are all mostly familiar with competitive swimming within our state, there is no denying that all competitive swimmers are alike. And whether you've left the sport already or are somehow still managing to keep up with it, all of these things were true in your life at some point.

1. You've seen times earlier than you knew existed.

And if you've quit, you do everything you can to never wake up that early again.

2. Your shirt size is based on your shoulder size.

Because swimming hates your body and wants to make everyone look like a man.

3. "Two-a-days" were year round.

And it was always a joke when other athletes complained when their two-a-days came around.

4. Birthdays were the best days.

Relays AND donuts? Count me in.

5. You've spent hours of your life staring at a black line.

If you've never experienced it, it makes you feel pretty empty and hopeless.

6. The smell of latex will always remind you of opening a new cap.

Or ripping one, honestly.

7. Your diet consisted of carbs, carbs, and more carbs.

Bagels, pasta, and bread. And more bread.

8. This was your team's reaction when your main set was a kick set:

Even if you couldn't kick with your friends. Whatever, coach.

9. You frequently went to school with your hair wet.

And quickly got over it when you realized how much more time you had to eat if you didn't blow dry your hair.

10. You've never been more frustrated than when someone wouldn't stop touching your feet.

I FEEL YOU. JUST WAIT UNTIL I GET TO THE WALL.

11. You get possessive during the Olympics.

Because this is your sport. You get what these athletes go through, and it's more than just something fun to watch on TV.

12. And you hate TV shows and movies that show swimming.

Because that's now what you look like and that's now how slow you go.

13. Splash magazine was your monthly reading material.

And you always checked those records in the middle to see if you knew anyone.

14. One-pieces and Speedos aren't awkward.

In fact, they can be iconic.

15. Your hair was never healthy.

Chlorine kills any hope of good hair that any swimmer ever had.

16. "The top" and "the bottom" will always mean :00 and :30.

"Leave on the top."

17. You always smelled like chlorine.

It never went away. Ever.

18. You will never be able to appropriately explain the pain of a knee-skin to anyone.

It's the tightest thing you've ever worn, but...worse.

19. Your non-swimmer friends always made fun of you when they saw pictures of you in a swim cap.

But like, it's normal?

20. You had zero social life.

Because practice ended at 6:30 and you had to get up at 5:00 the next morning. Sleep >

21. You repeatedly wonder why you did this to yourself.

And tell yourself that your kids will never be swimmers.

22. But inexplicably will always have a soft spot for the sport.

It dominated your entire life, after all.