It's no secret that turning 21 is a big deal; legally being able to drink, going into your senior year of college, the start of your adult life, etc. You’ve been on this earth for 21 years and have gained experience in many areas of life whether it's school, work, relationships, family, friends, and many more. With my 21st birthday coming up this Saturday, I felt that it was appropriate to share some of the life lessons that I have learned. These are the 21 things everyone should know before turning 21.
1. Be yourself.
There is only one you and you are irreplaceable. You are unique and different in your own individual way and that's what makes you unique. Don't ever let anyone tell you differently or that you need to change in order to “fit in” or be “popular”. You keep doing you and live your life the way you want.
2. You only get one life…
So make it worth something. You don't have to invent something or find the cure for a disease in order for your life to mean something. No matter who you are and what you do, you will leave an impact on this world, big or small. It's up to you to decide if you want that impact to be good or bad (I would advise on making a good impact).
3. Whatever you choose to do, do it with passion.
Lots of older people will tell our generation “whatever you choose to do, make sure it's what you want to do and that you do it with passion, otherwise you'll hate your life”. This couldn't be more true. Whether you want to become a doctor, a dancer, musician, engineer, teacher, etc. make sure you choose it because you'll love it.
4. It's OK to go to college and not know what you want to major in.
We're told that at the age of 17 we should know what we want to major in, yet we still can't go to the bathroom without asking for permission, that's kind of jacked up don't you think? Back in high school I looked down on people who didn't know what their college plans were, but looking back, it’s totally ok to be a senior in high school and not know what you want to do for the rest of your life. Since my sophomore year of high school I thought I was going to be an Athletic Trainer, this past fall I realized I HATED it and switched majors. I'm now a senior in college and I'm still uncertain of what I want to do after college, and that's perfectly ok.
5. It's OK to go to college having your life planned out.
On the other hand so many people have their whole life's planned before they even graduate high school, which is also totally ok. Some people are just more certain of what they want to do than others. I give you guys props for having your life together.
6. A boy or girl DOES NOT define you.
Back in high school I was best friends with a girl who was notorious for being a cheater. She'd find and start dating a new guy within a week, get bored, than she’d start cheating. This girl ALWAYS had to have a boyfriend or boys by herself because she didn't know who she was outside of a guy. It's perfectly ok to have a boy or a girl by your side just remember that they do not define you. You each are your own amazing individuals separately but you can be even greater when together.
7. You do not need to be in a relationship if you choose not to.
As college aged people we are told that we need to be in relationships; we need to start settling down. I can barely dress, feed, and take care of myself let alone another human being. Some people just do not want to be in a relationship right now and that's ok. The right time will come when you're ready and you'll find an incredible partner but for now if you want to stay single you live in your life and do you. No one should you for being single and if they do just brush them off.
8. If you want to be in a relationship, go for it.
I can honestly say a few months ago I was still the carefree girl who hated relationships and never thought about getting in one any time soon. I can now proudly say that I am in a great relationship with an amazing guy and I couldn't be happier. So many people our age bash people in relationships, there's nothing wrong with being in or wanting a relationship. Everyone is ready for a relationship at a different point in time in their lives.
9. Find and fill your friend group with people that you can't live without.
It took me 21 years to finally find amazing friends and people I want to be around. For the longest time I've always been in horrible friendships. I was always being put down, chosen last, told a guy is more important than our friendship, been used, etc. I've had way more than my fair share of toxic relationships and I can definitely say they suck and aren't any fun. Find the people you're inseparable with and know you'd want to be friends with for a long time.
10. Make time for yourself.
With the hustle and bustle of the busy world around us we often forget to take some time for ourselves. Your overall health should be a priority and that starts with remembering to take care of yourself. Take a personal day if needed, spend some money on yourself, buy a cat, do whatever you want! You're 21 for crying out loud!
11. Get out and explore.
Traveling has always been something that I loved to do. Whether it's discovering a new food place in my town, going to a new city in my home state, or venturing out to a different and new state or country. Exploring is a great way to have fun and discover things that you never knew, or thought that you would like. Do yourself a favor and go travel. You'll thank me later.
12. Have a relationship with your family.
I didn't come from the greatest family but I am grateful for the family I did come from. My mom taught me how to be strong, independent, not to be a pushover, how to stand up for myself, and how to not let people walk all over me and use me. For the longest time I didn't speak to my family and I wanted nothing to do with them, I'm glad I changed my mind. Yeah, my family still rags on me and makes fun of me just like any other family, but I still love them for it.
13. Don't waste your money on stupid stuff.
I am notorious for always spending money, especially on expensive things and things I don't need. I got $600 for my 16th birthday and I'm pretty sure I spent that all on food…oops. The point is, safe your money and don't be stupid with it.
14. Discover interests outside of your comfort zone.
Never once did I think something like crafting or painting would be something I'd get into. I'm glad I discovered something outside of my comfort zone because I really loved it. Taking a chance won't hurt you. The worst is that you won't end up liking it and that's ok.
15. Remember to have self respect.
So many people now a days have no self respect your themselves. They're either putting themselves down and/or dressing super provocatively to get the attention of the opposite sex. Nothing screams “I have no self respect” than dressing provocatively to get someone's attention or hanging all over someone. We are 21 and we need to start having respect for ourselves. How do we expect people to respect us if we can't respect ourselves first?
16. It's OK to be irresponsible…sometimes.
Yes, we are in college and it is the time to have fun, find ourselves, and be a little bit irresponsible. How else are we supposed to learn important life lessons if we don't make some irresponsible choices first? How will you know not to sign up for any more 8 a.m. classes if you don't go out the night before and go to class feeling like crap. How will you know to eat healthy if you don't eat crappy fast food that makes you sick? Being irresponsible sometimes is a good thing.
17. But you also have to be responsible.
Even though we are in college we still need to be responsible. We work jobs, go to class; were young adults so we should act like them. You never know who you're going to meet and I would strongly advise against going out every night, you're just going to feel and look like crap 24/7. Pick and choose when you're going to be irresponsible.
18. Have fun.
Many people forget that we are still young and we should still be having fun. We are young and we want to enjoy it while we can.
19. Don't be afraid to ask for help.
We're still growing up and learning, and with that comes making mistakes. We learn from our mistakes and shouldn't be ashamed from them. When something isn't going right don't be afraid to ask for help. We still have so much to learn and it's unrealistic for people to expect us to know everything. Asking for help is good.
20. Don't be afraid to make mistakes.
We all make mistakes and its unrealistic for people to assume that we don't. Making mistakes is how we learn so don't be afraid to make them. We all need to learn somehow.
21. Most importantly, remember that you're young.
You're only young once so take advantage of it.
