It's no secret that I've been single for some time. It can be an interesting dynamic when all of your friends are in relationships, getting hitched and having children, yet you don't have anyone in your romantic life. Sometimes it bothers me, but sometimes I appreciate that I'm young with the freedom to do what I want. Here are 21 things I constantly go through as a single 21-year-old.
1. Third-wheeling.
I'm a professional third-wheeler. I usually find a way to butt in and make sure everyone remembers I'm still there, but I know when to butt out and let couples do their thing.
2. Never having weekend plans.
This isn't necessarily a bad thing. I'm a major homebody, so I kind of like staying home most weekends watching Netflix and laying around with the dog.
3. Having to go on first dates.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F636052225529202777-1093529027_channing-tatum-cheese.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=476&h=3cd3a17b7fa84b67e858a08395166aefe50aa4a3ad255b31763dd49310a2c1a8&size=980x&c=1597475624 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F636052225529202777-1093529027_channing-tatum-cheese.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D476%26h%3D3cd3a17b7fa84b67e858a08395166aefe50aa4a3ad255b31763dd49310a2c1a8%26size%3D980x%26c%3D1597475624%22%7D" expand=1]
I try to avoid first date scenarios as much as possible. I typically invite someone to hang out with a group of friends or go somewhere where we don't have to talk one on one because we're actively doing something. I'm not good at small talk and most guys aren't either.
4. Feeling super independent and not caring to settle down.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F636052228415630446683042616_S4grzG4.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=709&h=1d2a44f6341551ade502cf5969a744a9645fe2586eab3d263034efa8d08dbb15&size=980x&c=2683615455 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F636052228415630446683042616_S4grzG4.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D709%26h%3D1d2a44f6341551ade502cf5969a744a9645fe2586eab3d263034efa8d08dbb15%26size%3D980x%26c%3D2683615455%22%7D" expand=1]
Every now and then I get a huge urge to stay single because I'm a very independent person and don't like to rely on others. I like me a lot of the time. Why not just hang out with myself?
5. Checking out every guy that walks by.
Going to the beach is officially one of my favorite activities.
6. Getting lonely pretty often.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F636052237810930848-348124398_mpzvX.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=927&h=4109d16ff864dc6ecdfc793ab3198dae65c425066bb152d2686c0317abfb2252&size=980x&c=3597249449 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F636052237810930848-348124398_mpzvX.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D927%26h%3D4109d16ff864dc6ecdfc793ab3198dae65c425066bb152d2686c0317abfb2252%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3597249449%22%7D" expand=1]
If you were to ask my family they'd label me as a loner. It's true, I like to be alone a lot of the time, but sometimes the idea of a significant other that will just watch a film with me without the need to do anything is pretty appealing.
7. Wearing whatever I want.
If I want to wear a low-cut top, I do it. If I want to wear sweats and a hoodie, I do it. I don't have to impress anyone and it's a darn good feeling.
8. Learning self-worth.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F636052242905398287-1148096912_tumblr_n4dy1nOOwu1st18yzo1_500.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=709&h=a7981df3863f155382b5ff9ab54e127fa70bef501a0f6d1c6ae31ec87f116a37&size=980x&c=2884423830 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F636052242905398287-1148096912_tumblr_n4dy1nOOwu1st18yzo1_500.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D709%26h%3Da7981df3863f155382b5ff9ab54e127fa70bef501a0f6d1c6ae31ec87f116a37%26size%3D980x%26c%3D2884423830%22%7D" expand=1]
I think I'm a pretty cool person. Why not just hang with myself?
9. Considering getting back with an ex because it has been so long.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F6360522461737886912045927379_9oDde.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=843&h=77c466b315d62132379d389a25eb181730913c37c7e7249320fd130e74fe2969&size=980x&c=1471502908 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F6360522461737886912045927379_9oDde.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D843%26h%3D77c466b315d62132379d389a25eb181730913c37c7e7249320fd130e74fe2969%26size%3D980x%26c%3D1471502908%22%7D" expand=1]
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
10. Remembering why my exes suck.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F636052248504402267-1251451596_0%2AGUDsIL6jhs9lNCZa.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=818&h=1a5d79048afe7e2fb6046ca3bb5022b61853fac9adce9482dbb73419c914dfad&size=980x&c=3096601866 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F636052248504402267-1251451596_0%252AGUDsIL6jhs9lNCZa.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D818%26h%3D1a5d79048afe7e2fb6046ca3bb5022b61853fac9adce9482dbb73419c914dfad%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3096601866%22%7D" expand=1]
Times aren't that desperate yet.
11. Drunk texting said exes.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F636052251276236408-594281709_closure-drunk-dial-friends-gif.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=344&h=3afff8bbea6b806798f4ae8d4d091db0e74315b611dc08fbcb9fba6ba59e1993&size=980x&c=3129383768 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F636052251276236408-594281709_closure-drunk-dial-friends-gif.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D344%26h%3D3afff8bbea6b806798f4ae8d4d091db0e74315b611dc08fbcb9fba6ba59e1993%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3129383768%22%7D" expand=1]
Every once in a while it makes me feel better to get things off of my chest, but usually it makes my exes think they dodged a bullet.
12. Drinking solo.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F6360522553094912681109980934_giphy-5.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=598&h=b3f022f8d471a3eda7fcb195424fcdee376459163d69330e9d09215e70142fb8&size=980x&c=3120433787 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F6360522553094912681109980934_giphy-5.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D598%26h%3Db3f022f8d471a3eda7fcb195424fcdee376459163d69330e9d09215e70142fb8%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3120433787%22%7D" expand=1]
There's nothing wrong with wanting a glass of wine! It's when the glass turns into a whole bottle that issues arise.
13. When people ask what happened to my last boyfriend.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F6360522570880890181290462468_Britney-Shh.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=1021&h=34483b663519f8f84c2336c9f9c110d7a6eec6827f71c1b51087f5d527cbb545&size=980x&c=3830945759 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F6360522570880890181290462468_Britney-Shh.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D1021%26h%3D34483b663519f8f84c2336c9f9c110d7a6eec6827f71c1b51087f5d527cbb545%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3830945759%22%7D" expand=1]
I'm sorry, I refuse to speak of he whose name shall not be spoken.
14. Activating, deactivating, then reactivating Tinder.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F6360523579272508171556816654_68183e20-a7ff-0133-a052-0e7c926a42af.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=483&h=475ba4287d94c75af45979e6476b5638479404c15402b1229535230233e3ad18&size=980x&c=4197817634 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F6360523579272508171556816654_68183e20-a7ff-0133-a052-0e7c926a42af.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D483%26h%3D475ba4287d94c75af45979e6476b5638479404c15402b1229535230233e3ad18%26size%3D980x%26c%3D4197817634%22%7D" expand=1]
I keep telling myself I'm not desperate and I can delete my Tinder. Then a few weeks pass and I realize my love life is still going nowhere. Reactivation complete.
15. People setting me up with horrible matches.
Your cousin's cousin's best friend's neighbor is cute and all, but his obsession with meerkats is a bit of a turn off.
16. People pinning me off on their boyfriend's subpar friend.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F6360522689576357121865190861_giphy-6.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=854&h=a171d9cbc2e049adb8514501e17a042d29ec110bc5751ad9869fe156e517931e&size=980x&c=3119912094 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F6360522689576357121865190861_giphy-6.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D854%26h%3Da171d9cbc2e049adb8514501e17a042d29ec110bc5751ad9869fe156e517931e%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3119912094%22%7D" expand=1]
I'll be going home now, thank you.
17. Fending for myself when I'm sick.
There's nothing better than a significant other to bring you soup and medicine when you're sick, but just lying in the same spot all day wallowing in self-pity works just fine too.
18. People asking who I'm seeing now.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F6360523454280508611982287937_large.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=875&h=5bd972a313ba7d9970a57f6467958998862494cfadc4f44c4a4947f232043656&size=980x&c=908296652 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F6360523454280508611982287937_large.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D875%26h%3D5bd972a313ba7d9970a57f6467958998862494cfadc4f44c4a4947f232043656%26size%3D980x%26c%3D908296652%22%7D" expand=1]
What is a boyfriend? How do you get one? Do you have to, like, feed them or something?
19. Having an excuse to cuddle with the dog all the time.
Having a dog is a lot like having a boyfriend. They both eat all of your food, make messes they don't clean up and smell a little funny. The biggest difference is that dogs are loyal and not afraid of commitment...
20. Never having to shave my legs.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F636052350608476392-1633360918_tumblr_nnte5jHOsl1rpnlsjo1_500.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=495&h=9cce9388630700800c78815a10af8f81fcb16804dd8444a2525e422c2f1eb143&size=980x&c=1887173311 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F636052350608476392-1633360918_tumblr_nnte5jHOsl1rpnlsjo1_500.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D495%26h%3D9cce9388630700800c78815a10af8f81fcb16804dd8444a2525e422c2f1eb143%26size%3D980x%26c%3D1887173311%22%7D" expand=1]
My body grows this hair for a reason. Who am I to question it by cutting it off?
21. Learning from past experiences.
[rebelmouse-proxy-image https://media.rbl.ms/image?u=%2Ffiles%2F2016%2F07%2F27%2F6360523522521038951157319128_tumblr_nysv0qH5uP1rkiuhro1_500.gif&ho=https%3A%2F%2Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net&s=287&h=b8ffa4da708ee1ca35d8aa8dc0153a9edb3e01b21f432ea32495f0422b7e8fd0&size=980x&c=3047372764 crop_info="%7B%22image%22%3A%20%22https%3A//media.rbl.ms/image%3Fu%3D%252Ffiles%252F2016%252F07%252F27%252F6360523522521038951157319128_tumblr_nysv0qH5uP1rkiuhro1_500.gif%26ho%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Faz616578.vo.msecnd.net%26s%3D287%26h%3Db8ffa4da708ee1ca35d8aa8dc0153a9edb3e01b21f432ea32495f0422b7e8fd0%26size%3D980x%26c%3D3047372764%22%7D" expand=1]
Hey, bad decisions make the world go 'round.
So my love life hasn't been all that promising as of late, but you know what has been? My journey to loving myself so I can learn to be loved by someone else. In the meantime, I'm just having fun and taking it day by day. If someone comes along soon, I'll be completely open to whatever life has in store. If not, I am perfectly happy drinking wine, watching Pokemon and lying to myself about when I'll finally shave my legs.
When One Person and One Person and One Person Become Many
Music Heals The Soul
This Summer, Dress to Feel Like Yourself
time-lapse photography of river
Photo by 
body of water during daytime
Photo by 
Empire State building
Photo by 
water falls in the middle of green trees
Photo by 
