We've all heard the statement rattled off that with age comes inherent wisdom. While I don't know the entire validity of that statement, I do feel as if in my short 21 years of life I have learned a thing or two. I would like to take a moment to share my bits and pieces of "wisdom" with you--feel free to take them with a grain of salt.
1. It's okay not to have everything figured out.
I know it's cliche, but it could not be truer. The amount of times I have changed my mind, my major and my life plans is endless. 21 is still young, and there is still plenty of time to figure things out.
2. You're going to mess up- and you might not learn from it right away- and that's okay too.
I've always heard that it's okay to make a mistake, so long as you learn from it. But what if you don't? Mistakes happen...and sometimes the same mistake happens a few times, and that's okay. As long as you learn from it eventually, there should be no shame in messing up a couple times.
3. You're probably going to lose a few friendships.
It's easy to think that you're going to be that one person that keeps up with all of their hometown, high school friends, but as time goes on, people drift. Friendships are no longer made out of convenience and because of that, you're probably going to lose a few.
4. You actually need to work for the relationships you want to keep up.
None of this, "if they wanted to talk to me, they would hit me up". If you want to talk to someone, talk to them. Everyone is getting older, getting busier and getting caught up in their own lives. As much as that sucks, it's reality. If you want a friendship to last, you need to put the effort in.
5. When people fail, dogs will always be there (or cats, I guess).
Dogs are a (wo)man's best friend. Always & forever. Maybe a cat too, but preferably a dog.
6. When animals fail (which is highly unlikely) wine will definitely always be there.
Wine doesn't ask questions, wine doesn't judge and wine will always be there for you.
7. Surround yourself with people who make you want to be a better person, who make you laugh a little harder and who make you see the brightness in each day.
Over the years I have lost a lot of friendships, however, those lost friendships are nothing compared to the gains I have made; I have learned to surround myself with people who support me, encourage me and pick me up when I am down. I have surrounded myself with friends who make even the bleakest of days bright, everyone needs those kinds of friends in their lives.
8. Don't get hung up on someone who isn't worth your time of day. You're wasting precious time.
Stop talking to the person who only hits you up at 2 a.m.. Stop talking to the people who never seem to include you. Stop talking to those who make you feel like a bother. You deserve better.
9. Do something outside of your comfort zone every single day.
If you're not doing something that scares you each day, you're not really living. Even something as small as initiating a conversation can go a long way.
10. Have goals that scare you, and just a few that are comfortable.
It's important to have goals, I know that, you know that, we all know that. Goals are meant to be a little scary and unattainable; they're meant to motivate you. In my short 21 years though, I've learned that it's important to throw a few comfy goals into the mix. Throw in some goals that you know are easily attainable. Reach those goals, celebrate, get pumped, and then move onto the big goals.
11. Don't be afraid to say "no," all the time and as much as you need to.
It's easy to fall into the pattern of being a people-pleasing "Yes (wo)man". We've all done it. Try swapping out one "yes" for a "no" each day. Say no sometimes, take time for yourself.
12. Don't be afraid to say "yes," on your own terms.
On the opposite side of things, open yourself up to saying "yes." Step out of your comfort zone and say yes to something that challenges you.
13. Go out with your friends, spend that $20, and make some memories.
In all cheesiness, you're only young once. It's easy to get caught up in the mode of saving money and living your life in a responsible manner, but what happens once you're old and you don't have the opportunity to live like you're in your 20s again? Go make those memories.
14. Smile at a stranger.
It makes for a win-win situation; either you're making a stranger's day or you're pushing yourself out of your comfort zone.
15. It's 100% okay to "treat yo-self" as often as you need to.
I've learned that more often than not, life becomes overwhelming. You need to reward yourself whether it be big or small. Self-love over everything, always.
16. Never settle in any aspects of your life.
You deserve the world and then some. Don't settle for anything less.
17. Be your very own hype man.
No one else is going to hype up your own successes; you have to! Be proud, brag a little, show off your accomplishments. You've earned it.
18. Always feign the fullest confidence in yourself.
If you find yourself consistently full of confidence, great. But if not, fake it until you make it, right?
19. Make eye contact, speak with a authority and don't second guess yourself.
Omit "like," "um," "I think," "maybe" from your vocabulary. Speak with confidence and authority. Speak with power because you deserve to be listened to.
20. The future is scary- the best you can do is focus on what's happening now and live your life for that.
We shouldn't spend our entire youth planning and wishing for a future. Sooner than you know it that future will be here. Live for the now, live in the moment and worry later.
21. Most importantly, I've learned that I have a heck of a lot more to learn.
There are times when I like to think that I am old, wise and have learned it all...those moments are fleeting. Sure, I've come a long way and I have learned some invaluable lessons, but man, do I have a lot more to learn.
