Dogs. What did humans ever do to deserve dogs? They don't care what you look like, how you dress, how much money you have, what your grades are, or what your job is. All they care about is loving people and making all the friends they can, which is exactly why they would make great college students. So, I present to you 19 Classes Dogs Would Take If They Could Go To College.
1. How To Get More Head Scratches
The only complaint to make against head scratches is that you're not getting enough of them! Learning how to get more scratches would be very beneficial.
2. The Philosophy Of Fetch
3. Home Defense Against Squirrels
Learn how to protect your home from nature's number one nuisance: squirrels. Nobody likes squirrels.
4. Behind The Belly Rub
Ahhhhhhh, belly rubs. Learn the best belly rubs and how to better appreciate them.
5. The Art Of The Bark
Barking is an art. There are so many tones and so much body language to go with. Happy bark, sad bark, hungry bark, play with me bark, so many barks to learn and perfect.
6. Making Friends Of All Kinds
Dogs may be man's best friend, but they can also be friends with all other walks of life. Learn to appreciate unexpected friends.
7. The Making Of The Mess
Making a mess is bad of course, but it's just so satisfying. It's almost too compelling to turn down. The only difficult part is looking cute enough to get in the least amount of trouble possible.
8. Cat Chasing 101
Humans say that chasing cats is bad, but what else are cats for? If they're in the yard, how can you not chase them?
9. Who Is The Good-est Boy?
We're all good boys and girls, but who is the good-est of them all?
10. How To Take Care Of Your Human
11. Doggo Digging
Dogs were meant to dig, and who knows, maybe one day we'll dig all the way to China.
12. FOOD... And More Food, And Treats
Learn the best begging techniques to convince your human to give you more food and treats!
13. The Best Way To Avoid Baths
Baths are gross. Why would us dogs want to smell like vanilla or flowers or fruit or any other nonsense. We want to smell like dirt and grass and wet dog!
14. Taking ALL Of The Walks
Improve your walking techniques to convince your human to take you on more walks!
15. Canine Careers
You're a strong independent doggo, you can grow up to be whatever you want to be. Learn about all the careers out there for hard working canines.
16. The Science Of Sleeping
Work and play is fun, but napping is one of the best joys in life (especially if you can sneak a nap in on the couch or bed). Learn how to be a better napper and live a less sleepy (maybe) life.
17. Rules Of The Car Ride
18. Learn To Doggy Paddle
There's no being a doggy without knowing the doggy paddle. It's part of the canine bylaws, plus pools and water are just so fun.
19 Petting Vs. Patting: The Rivalry
Pets are nice and smooth and relaxing, you can never get enough pets. But have you also tried pats? Because pats are also nice but fun and exciting.
