2015 was a year of many great things, from the Kansas City Royals winning their first World Series in over 30 years, to Left Shark and the awesomeness that he is. However, there are so many things that do not deserve to make their way into 2016. Here are my 15 things that need to stay in 2015.
1) Watch Me (Whip/Nae Nae)
The biggest thing there was during this past summer was Watch Me by Silentó, which basically was a typical hip-hop/rap track with repeated lyrics that essentially asked the listener to watch Silentó do various dance moves. In addition to the already repetitive track, there was an accompanying dance, which was in essence a rehash of Soulja Boy's Crank That, the Cat Daddy, Teach Me How to Dougie, and some other internet dance trends that fizzled out after a few months of popularity. Call me what you like, but I just don't understand the mass appeal to dances like this. And unless Silentó comes up with "Watch Me Pt. 2" or something along those lines, chances are we're never gonna be watching him do anything except fade into obscurity.
2) Hotline Bling
Along the same lines, Drake's Hotline Bling needs to remain in 2015. Sure, I enjoyed the parodies as much as the next person, but the only reason that the song became popular was because of the stupid music video. The song itself is pretty repetitive and stupid to begin with, but it only gets intensified with the addition of the music video. Comedy Central's The Daily Show described it as "a haunting portrayal of a man having a seizure inside of a tanning bed". However, I like to think of it more as someone doing a combination of the Carlton and a Touchdown celebration dance while stuck in slow motion in some sort of disco cube.
3) Adele's Leave of Absence
Oh Adele, how we've missed you so. It's been four years since your last full album, 21, was released. Sure you released "Skyfall" in 2012, but even that was three years ago. But, you come back with 25, an album that gets to the level of 21, with many hits already coming from it. Of course there is "Hello", the song that all radio hosts and DJs have heard on repeat since its release in late October. With its subtle piano backing, and its lyrics so masterfully sung by your amazing vocals. Please don't leave us again. We need you Adele.
4) Jon Stewart's Retirement
Don't get me wrong, I like Trevor Noah. He's a nice-- a refreshing touch to the talk show host field: a young, South African who has helped on The Daily Show before Stewart's departure. However, Jon Stewart brought something to comedy and news in general that has hardly been rivaled. From 1999 until this past year, he hosted The Daily Show on Comedy Central, and in that time gave some of the best comedy on political issues, but at the same time was able to address tragedy with a masterful balance of tact and comedy. As he said in his clip addressing the Eric Garner decision, "If comedy is tragedy plus time, I need more f***in time, but I would really settle for less f***in tragedy to be honest with you." I love his sort of deadpan, honest style of approaching the news whilst still giving his comedic touch to the matter. It has been reported that he will return to host his own show on HBO starting in 2016, and let us hope this is the case, because we need him back.
5) Sepp Blatter's Tenure as President of FIFA
As someone who is a huge fan of international soccer, the Sepp Blatter scandal has been of great importance to me (and, yes, I know that it is called football everywhere except the U.S., and I would call it that, but, as I am writing in the U.S., and most people reading will be in the U.S., I will refer to it as soccer). Sepp Blatter is the eighth president of FIFA, and has served since 1998. However, in June of this past year, it was discovered that he, and other FIFA officials had been involved in a bribery and money laundering ring. Blatter decided to step down as president, and allow the FIFA Congress to vote for their next president, while still remaining on until a decision had been reached. Yet, he somehow has remained as president of FIFA, despite having these charges against him. As of December 21st, he was banned for eight years from all FIFA activities, but is still president of FIFA. It is quite incredible how corrupt the organization must be if they cannot get rid of a president who is known to be corrupt himself.
6) Minions
Minions. Where to begin. I hate the Minions with a burning passion. These overused obnoxious minor characters took too large of a role in the Despicable Me movies, especially the second. They are supposed to be there for comic relief, which I realize is needed in a children's movie, however, this should not deteriorate from the main story of the movie. These two movies are about Gru, his relationship with the three girls, and how it develops over the films. The Minions take away from this. They push the line between comedic and obnoxious and then some. They take over as the main focus of the movie. And Universal realized this, and used this to their financial advantage. They beat this dead horse of a character idea so much it wasn't recognizable anymore. And then they went and made their own movie for it. This needs to stop, or it will continue with other movies. Oh, and their STUPID VOICES! UGH!
7) Hoverboards
Ok, technically they aren't hoverboards. They are "self-balancing two-wheeled scooters". But for all intents and purposes, I'll call them hover boards to keep it simple. Anyway, these hoverboards are essentially segways for people who are too lazy to hold onto the handle. The most popular videos of people riding them are videos of those same people falling off them. Oh, and they've been known to combust or explode in the past, so that a fun "feature". Saturday Night Live actually parodied this problem.The point is, just stop riding them. Wait until actual hover boards come out, then maybe you can ride those.
8) The Dress
The Dress was the largest internet phenomenon in the early half of the year. In late February, a bride-to-be's mother posted a photo of the dress she planned to wear to her daughter's wedding. However, the dress caused a large commotion due to the fact that there was a discrepancy on the color of the dress itself, whether it was white and gold, or black and blue. To me, it doesn't matter, because of how ludicrous the concept is. It is just something that caused too much of a stir on the internet. And now there's the Dog Wearing Pants debate, as seen in this photo:
9) Protest over Starbucks' cups
When Starbucks released their new holiday cups this Christmastime, they were solid red in color. This caused an outrage in the Christian community, who were angry that Starbucks had removed such traditional signs of the Christmas holiday, such as snowflakes, ornaments, and Christmas trees. It's such an outrage that Starbucks should remove these traditional signs of Christ's birth, his adoration, and these symbols that are so commonly seen in 1st Century Roman-occupied Palestine. As a Christian myself, I found it slightly irritating that people are focusing on the designs and imprints on their coffee cups, and not the designs and imprints on their hearts.
10) Half of the GOP Field
The GOP field, evidenced by the fact that they need more than one debate to host all of their candidates, is too large. Already, five have dropped out of the race, but a dozen still exist. Leaders in the race are businessman Donald Trump, neurosurgeon Dr. Ben Carson, and actual politicians Jeb Bush, Marco Rubio, and Ted Cruz (Well, by actual I mean someone who has experience in politics, not someone who knows what they're doing). This does not even reach half of the candidates still in the race. Ultimately, this wide field of candidates will cause nothing but division for the Republicans and jokes for everyone else.
11) Martin Shkreli's Freedom
Martin Shkreli is possibly the most despicable person from this past year. He first came into the spotlight when he purchased Daraprim, a pill that helps combat malaria, parasites, and AIDS, among other things. However, in September of this year, he raised the price of the pill by 5,500%, thus making it too expensive to afford, which became an issue due to the fact that many users of the pill came from low-wealth areas. He was thus criticized by many, included Bernie Sanders, Hillary Clinton, and Donald Trump. In addition to this action, as well as having the nastiest, smuggest, smile of all time, he bought the only copy of the Wu-Tang Clan album, Once Upon a Time in Shaolin. He has often been described as a "spoiled brat" and "outrageous". However, justice seemingly came to him in December when he was arrested for security fraud because he ran a Ponzi-esque theme. However, he has since been released on bond. Hopefully, someone will put him away for good.
12) What Are Those
What Are Those is another internet sensation that popped up through Vine and Instagram. You couldn't walk five feet without hearing someone say this phrase. Anyone who wore a pair of shoes that were not remotely mainstream would have this phrase shouted at them. It all started when someone uploaded a video of them asking a police officer this phrase, before pointing at the shoes they were wearing. It grew quickly, before being used by various people on the internet, as well as being dubbed over a Jurassic Park clip. It grew massively, and got annoying having anyone and everyone shout it at you.
13) Leonardo DiCaprio's Oscar-less streak
Leonardo DiCaprio is a good actor, by any definition of the word. Starring in films such as Titanic, The Departed, Shutter Island, Inception, and Django Unchained, he has been acting for almost 20 years now. In his career, he has been nominated for three Academy Awards for Best Actor, for his roles in The Aviator, Blood Diamond, and The Wolf of Wall Street. All three were brilliant films, especially the third. His performances are energetic and powerful, and at some point, he should gain the Best Actor victory. His most recent film, The Revenant, has been received fairly well, and his performance has been described as giving "ferocious 200% commitment" in Variety Magazine. DiCaprio deserves the honor, and in 2016 he will, hopefully, receive it.
14) The Attempt of Making a good Fantastic Four Movie
The reviews of the new Fantastic Four movie were horrible. The review for the last few Fantastic Four renditions were terrible. Basically, we should give up hope that 20th Century Fox is able to make a good movie, and that they'll be able to give the rights to Marvel Studios already. (And I know that The Incredibles has been credited as "the good Fantastic Four movie", and I wish this were the case, but alas, it is not)
15) Meninism
Meninism is the dumbest thing this year, without a doubt. It is supposed to be a satire of Feminism. But it is not. It is some stupid frat boys who think that their "oppression" by feminists is unjust. I don't really want to elaborate any further because they aren't worth the time.
Well, that's all for this year! Hopefully, 2016 will be slightly better than this past year.