Originally hailing from the Boston area, going to college in New York was a bit of an adjustment for me. I even showed up to move-in day freshman year wearing a Red Sox t-shirt. People thought I was just being an a--hole, but I honestly forgot that there are people who hate the Red Sox — and I go to school with them now. From my first day here up to now, I still get asked these questions. At first they were somewhat amusing, but now they're just irritating.
1. “Wait — if you’re from Boston, why don’t you have an accent?”
Even though Boston accents are pretty bad-ass, not everyone from the Boston area has one. It really all depends on if your parents have an accent. I don't have one, except for the occasional times I say words differently (see # 9). However, most people from Boston who don't have accents can do an excellent imitation of one.
2. “Are you from Boston Boston or like outside of Boston?”
I get this question a lot. No, I do not live in the actual city of Boston, but there is a thing called Greater Boston. Here is a map for reference. The light blue is Greater Boston — I live within that area.
3. “If you live outside of the city, then why do you say you’re from Boston?”
Because if I told you that I'm from Franklin, Massachusetts, you would have no idea where the hell I'm talking about.
4. “Oh my god, why are you a Red Sox fan?”
I am shocked at how often I get asked this question. Seriously? My family has lived in the Boston area for almost 100 years. My father would disown me if I wasn't a Red Sox fan.
5. “Say ‘Park the Car in Harvard Yard.’”
I don't have an accent, I will not say it with an accent and that phrase is dumb because you physically cannot park in Harvard Yard. And no, whatever accent you just tried to do with that phrase does not sound like a Boston accent.
6. “Why do you call it a bubbler? That’s so stupid.”
Many people ask me this on the reg, but it's actually not that stupid. If you look at a bubbler, aka water fountain, the water really does bubble up out of it. So, I'm going to keep saying it.
7. “You say 'Reese’s Pieces' weirdly.”
I didn't even know that this was a Boston thing until all of my friends from New Jersey and New York told me and people from Boston that we say it weirdly. Honestly though, "Reese's Pieceeees" (rhymes with CiCi's) sounds cooler to me.
8. “Do you know Mark Wahlberg? Or Ben Affleck?”
Yeah I do. Because they totaly just walk around Boston introducing themselves to random people all the time.
9. “It’s not called a ‘rum’ it’s called a ‘room’.”
No, it's called a regional accent. Everybody has one.
10. “Jimmies and sprinkles are the same thing right?”
Wrong. These are jimmies:
These are sprinkles:
I have no idea why. That's just the way it is.
11. “Why is it the New England Patriots and not the Boston Patriots?”
I get this question a surprising number of times, and the only answer I can think of is that Gillette Stadium isn't in the city of Boston, it's in Foxborough, Massachusetts. And, since I'm assuming nobody would have any idea where the "Foxborough Patriots" are from, they just went with New England. Also, New England is as big as one state, so it wouldn't make sense for there to be a football team for each New England state. But that's just a guess.
12. “How could you even think that Dunkin Donuts is better than Starbucks?”
Because it is. In every way. Also, it's "Dunks" not "Dunkin Donuts." And sometimes Gronk serves you your coffee.
13. “What does ‘wicked’ mean?”
I feel like we say this enough times for people to be able to figure out what it means, but it's basically used instead of "really" or "very." For example, "I am wicked hungry." And, for future reference, nobody actually says "wicked pisser".
14. “Why are you all bad drivers?”
This is such a misconception. We are not bad drivers — we are just extremely aggressive. If we were bad drivers, there's no way we could navigate driving around Boston. It's a mess.
15. “Why do you call yourself a masshole like it’s a compliment?”
Because "masshole" is 100 percent a compliment. I'm proud of where I'm from, and yeah, we may be a little more aggressive than everybody else. But Boston is my home. I wouldn't trade that for anything.
