As someone that has transferred schools three times within the past four years, I feel as though I am obligated to give all of the world's potential transfer-ees advice on not only making the decision, but also what to expect and how to handle it.
1. Don't transfer for a boy. Or a girl.
First of all, you should never transfer for anyone but yourself. That should be obvious. I know that if you are transferring to follow a boyfriend or a girlfriend, or you just so happen to be transferring to the same school as the person you like, you've probably heard at least 10 people say, "oh my God, I can't believe you're transferring just for him/her." I also know that you're probably super annoyed every time you hear it come out of someone's mouth. However, you should stop shrugging off this really reasonable piece of advice, because most of the people telling you that you're making a mistake by following your loved one, are speaking from experience. They aren't just whipping some ridiculous, spontaneous piece of negativity out of their butt.
2. You WILL lose some friends
It's impossible to keep in touch with everyone. Especially those sort-of-friends that you really only hung out with on the weekends. If you're lucky and you're good at communicating, you'll probably be able to keep in touch with your closer friends, however, it will still be difficult.
3. It may take you a little longer than you expected to make friends.
As a transfer student, you're at a disadvantage. You're moving to a school where all the people that are in the same grade as you have probably already made friends. Therefore, you have to do some pretty serious wedging to make your way into any solid friend groups. It can take anywhere from weeks, to months to make friends in a new place. But hey, at least you'll get really good at overthinking in your spare time while you're sitting alone in your apartment.
4. Joining clubs and becoming involved at school is not always the best way to meet people.
Although everyone always tells you to join as many clubs as you can in school if you want to make friends, most clubs don't actually meet because everyone is so busy with their work and school schedules. Therefore, if you want to make friends quick, I would suggest getting a job at a local restaurant or taking classes at an art studio, yoga studio, improv shop, Crossfit gym or rock climbing gym to meet locals and other people with similar interests.
5. If you go in with high expectations you will be disappointed.
If you move to a different state or school thinking that it's going to erase all the negatives out of your life, free you from any current drama or make you the most popular person within a 50 mile radius of your new "home" just because you're new, then you're sadly mistaken. Unfortunately your problems don't leave just because you do and it takes a while to make friends seeing as your new school probably has at least 5,000 people attending it and you're transferring there knowing absolutely no one.
6. Overcoming the challenge of a drastic change is very fulfilling and empowering.
Although there are several scary negatives to transferring or moving away, once you overcome them--especially if you overcome them alone--you will feel so independent and so good about yourself that nothing will ever be able to stop you.
7. If all else fails moving back home and starting over is almost always still an option.
8. Some days are going to be really tough--you're going to miss your friends a lot, but in the end it will be worth it and if it isn't, refer back to number 7.
9. Whatever you do, wherever you go, make sure you explore and get to know your surroundings before you decide that you regret your decision to move or transfer.
You can't decide that you hate your new school or town if you haven't put any effort into getting to know it or into making friends. You can't just leave your apartment or dorm for work or school. Look for some cool local coffee shops, go downtown and be a tourist, visit the local art museums, attend festivals and annual events. Get to know your city! Get to know your school--even if you have to do it alone.
10. Adjusting to your new environment is going to be really weird.
If you have lived in the same city for your entire life, you know all the cool places, you know all the secrets, you know the concert venues, the party spots, the good bars, the general flow of traffic, which roads to avoid, etc. When you move, you're going to have to start from scratch. You will not know how to get anywhere, you will not know where to eat, where to hang out, what areas are safe or what areas are dangerous. Although this sounds kind of daunting and scary, you should take it as an adventure. You have a blank slate in front of you. No one is influencing your opinion. You can do whatever you want without having to worry what your friends would think. You are so free! Every day can be a mission to discover something new about this wonderful city that you now call home.
11. The most important thing to remember is that no matter what, you should do what you believe is best for you and your future.
If that means transferring to a school 10,000 miles away or moving back home for your local art program, do it. Just make sure that it is what is best for you.
