Height is often something that people either like or dislike about themselves and wish they could change. I have heard so many people, especially girls, say that they wish they were shorter. Yes, being short has it perks. However, I'm 4'11" and here to tell you that it is not that great. We short people face a variety of challenges and struggles in our daily lives that people on the taller end of the height spectrum wouldn't understand. Being vertically challenged can be a real pain, so I've decided to gather a list of some things that myself, and other members of the little people community, deal with everyday in our lives so close to the ground.
1. The Driving Dilemmas
Do you have any idea how hard it can be to reach the pedals? When I drive, I have to move the seat all the way up to the steering wheel just so I can see over it and get to the pedals. Don't even get me started on how useless those sun visors are. I put the visor down and the sun is still blinding me. It just gets used to hold my CDs at this point. Note to self: ALWAYS have sunglasses handy. However, the look of concern on people's faces who pass me because they think a 13 year old is driving is somewhat satisfying and entertaining.
2. Looking Younger Than You Really Are
Of course, most of you would read this and say "isn't that a good thing?" Yeah, if you're an older adult. Not when you're 20 years old and everyone thinks you're 14. This will become a perk once I'm older, but for now, it sucks. Especially when people who are much younger than you are taller than you. Every time my younger sister and I meet someone new, they automatically assume she's older just because she's taller. No, that is false. I'm older. You are wrong.
3. High Shelves
Nothing drives me more insane than when my mother puts things on the top shelves and asks ME, of all people, to get it. Are you nuts?! How do you expect me to get up there?! If you want me to get it, you better grab me a chair to stand on or put me on your shoulders. I also think there should be a restriction on how high the shelves can be in stores. Nothing is more embarrassing than being seen jumping up and down in the aisles trying to reach something. It encourages laughter and pity, which is not cool with me.
4. The Inevitable Nomination To Crawl Into Small Places
"Lose something and can't get into that small space to get it? Oh, don't worry. The short person will get it." No, no I will not. I would love to help you out, but what if I get stuck in there?? I know for a fact that you won't crawl in there and rescue me. And what if I don't want to go in there? I'm claustrophobic. Just because I'm smaller doesn't mean I'm obligated to surrender myself to that tiny, anxiety-inducing space. You want it, you go get it.
5. Nicknames
If you're short, your actual birth name isn't a thing anymore. You will, from now on, be referred to as "midget," "dwarf," "short stack," "small fry," "shorty," etc. No matter what you do to try to put an end to it, you will fail. Face it, these names are stuck with you for life. It's just something I've accepted at this point, and you should too. Along with this, it also becomes quite irritating being 20 years old and being told I'm "cute" and "adorable." Excuse me?! I am 20, not two. Can we use more adult adjectives like "pretty" or "gorgeous?" I'm still an adult, just a mini one. Therefore I'd like to be spoken to like an adult. I'm not even going to get into the problem of being talked to in a baby voice. That's a whole different issue within its own.
6. The Assumption That It's OK To Pick You Up
I mean literally grab you and lift you into the air. This is beyond annoying. Just because I'm short does mean you have the automatic invitation to pick me up like I'm a little child. I would like to keep my feet planted on the ground, please. I don't want you touching me either. If I want to be picked up, I will ask for a piggy-back ride. Other than that, hands off.
7. Pants
You have no idea how difficult it is to shop for pants. Even those brands that sell short length pants aren't short enough and I still need my mother to hem them. If I don't have them hemmed, they hang over my shoes and I have to worry about tripping or getting the ends ruined from stepping on them. People wonder why I despise shopping, unlike most other girls.
8. Walking
Yes, this simple task can be a pain if you're walking with other people of average or taller height. Let me do some math for you. One step for someone else is equivalent to three steps for me. That means I have to walk three times as fast just to keep up with them. They're just casually strolling along while I'm falling behind, huffing and puffing, trying to keep up. Can we slow it down a bit? I think my lung collapsed about five minutes ago.
9. Overlooked And Unseen
Because you're one of the smallest in a crowd, no one can ever see you. Looking for someone in a room jam packed with people is just a loss cause because you'll never be found. Find a table or chair to stand on and wave your arms around when you see who you're looking for. You'll have a much higher success rate this way. Concerts are a nightmare because you can't see over the thousands of heads. This is a circumstance where I actually want to be picked up. If that's not an option, just accept that you'll have to watch the entire concert from the big screen and you won't see any live action from where you are, unless you were lucky enough to score front row seats.
10. Neck Pain And Awkward Eye Levels
Guys who are on the taller side can lead to uncomfortable conversations, considering I'm basically eye level with their crotches. Can you crouch just a little bit and make this less uncomfortable for the both of us? Not to mention the neck pain you get as a result of having to look up at everyone all the time when you speak to them. Please pause for one second, I need to give my neck a break from speaking to you.
11. The Dumbest Question Ever
"Why are you so short?" Yes, this is a real question I get asked all the time. No, I don't know why some people are stupid. You think I chose to be this short? Totally. One day I just decided, "I think I want to be really short for the rest of my life" and just didn't grow anymore (sarcasm, in case you didn't know). I can't help that I'm this short. Don't you think if I did have control over it I would at least make myself five feet tall? Yes, because I would. I didn't choose the short life, the short life chose me.
Don't get me wrong, being short has its advantages. We are a great group of fun sized people who have a good time down here on the ground. Although being shorter has its downfalls, I just keep reminding myself what my grandmother, who was just about 4'9", always told me: "don't worry, Caity. They stack shit high." To my fellow shorties out there, always remember that!
