Life can be stressful. With stacks of work to complete, dinner to cook, rooms to clean, and relationships to keep in tact, you might think the whole world is resting on your shoulders! Every now and then, you have to remind yourself that taking care of your own mental well-being is just as important as everything else. Relax! Take a breather. Give in to some of your cravings! Have some luxurious "me time". You might think you don't have the time or the money to indulge, but there are little things you can do during the day that can go a long way in making you a happier and healthier person. Here are 10 small things you can do to indulge in yourself.
1. Use the handicap stall in public bathrooms
You know that big, luxurious stall with all the legroom you could ask for- go for it! It may seem a bit greedy but it’s important to treat yourself every once in awhile.
2. Lace your daily cocaine line with meth
Tired of your boring old cocaine habits? Lacing your cocaine with meth is a great way to spice things up! Life is about trying new things. You can’t get stuck in a rut or you won’t be experiencing life to the fullest.
3. Eat with the good fork
You know you want to!!
4. Don’t recycle
You love the environment. But you sacrifice a lot; sometimes others need to sacrifice a little too for you to get a few moments of relaxation. In this case, it just happens to be all of humanity. And let’s be honest, recycling is a hassle! Having one bin for trash, one for paper, and one for bottles and cans… ummm no thank you! Too complicated for me!
5. Cry golden tears
Expressing emotions is important in any healthy person’s life. And what better way to express your sorrows than with pure 24 karat gold. It may cost a little bit more than what you’re used to but trust me, you’ll think it’s worth it.
6. Vote for Trump
Being a competent and respectable human being can really take a toll on you. Sometimes you just want to give into your deepest, darkest prejudices. Well, I’m here to say just let it all out, girl! Let that racist animal trapped inside you loose. Reject logic and reason. Delve into a euphoric state of ignorant bliss! You’re worth it!
7. Don’t talk to Becky
Just don’t talk to her. You don’t even really like Becky.
8. Watch an episode of Full House but actually enjoy it this time
I know. This might seem a little bit crazy but bear with me here. Full House was actually originally created for others to like. Look it up, it’s true! I know it may seem weird at first watching it for pleasure but if you try really hard I promise you you will find the slightest bit of joy from it.
9. Don’t feed your children for weeks and hoard all the food for yourself
Kids are a blessing from heaven. You love them to death; but being a parent is a full-time job and it can get overwhelming. Sometimes you just need to put the kids on hold for a second and focus on your own well-being.
10. Let yourself be gay for a night
Oh c’mon, just one night! It’s tough constantly denying the truth about your sexuality. You’ve been fighting these homosexual urges for years now. Isn’t it about time you indulged? Go to a gay bar! Nobody will find out if you cover your tracks well.
