Retail is a very scary place, but it does teach you some very valuable lessons about how to deal with people. Even though I do have to deal with these things on a daily basis, I still love my job.
1. People do not know how to read.
I seriously cannot tell you how many times I have had to explain a sale, a special, or a BOGO opportunity because they don’t understand the very clear signage.
- They always want to know where the bathroom is. I will tell you where the bathroom is, but please buy something, whether it be a shirt or a pack of gum. If you don’t, you’ll just be messing up my customer conversion.
- People never put things back where they belong. It is not that hard to walk two more feet and put the item back where it is supposed to go. Seriously, why do you want to make our jobs harder? (If you have that it’s-their-job-to-clean-up-after-me mentality, please get out of my store.)
- People will do anything to get out of spending money. Look, I know saving money is important, but I cannot give you a discount just because you ask for one. Also, I cannot use that coupon because it is expired. I repeat, I cannot use that coupon. It is expired!
- Always know what coupons your store has. Please, for the love of all that is great and beautiful on this earth, if you work in retail, know what coupons your store is giving out. There are people that will try to use expired ones or ones that aren’t even for your store.
- You hate the phrase, “Can I speak to a manager?” You are not going to get what you want just because you go whining to a manager. There are not magicians. They cannot just give you what you want when you want it.
- You get satisfaction in saying, “I am the manager.” I haven’t been able to use this one yet, but I am just waiting to see the look on that person’s face when they realize they have nowhere else to go.
- People who don’t work there will tell you how to do your job. I’m the one with the name tag. I’m the one that works here. If you tell me how to do my job, I will go to the back room and scream.
- People will come into the store knowing that you close in five minutes and will take their sweet time getting out. Whenever someone walks in at the last minute to get something, I suck it up and deal. Whenever someone does this and takes forever picking things out, knowing that we are about to close, I want to slam my head in a door.
- It doesn’t matter whether you like the music or not, you will get sick and tired of the corporate playlist. I work in a place where there is an excessive amount of Kidz Bop versions of popular songs, and I’m pretty sure some of my insanity is the result of hearing these songs on a daily basis.
