We all can admit breakups are hard. Honestly, they can straight-up suck. No one wants to go through the pain of saying goodbye to someone he or she once loved, but sometimes it is necessary. Often breakups are a one-way thing, and the individual who doesn’t want to let go gets left with a shattered heart and uncontrollable emotions. And although it is OK to cry and eat ice cream in bed for a week, eventually you have to get yourself up, put some effort into your appearance, and enter the dating world once again.
And so that’s what you do, but something is holding you back from putting yourself out there and meeting new guys. Actually it is not something. It is someone, and that someone is your ex that left you high and dry. So, here are 10 signs that will tell you if you're still stuck on him and how to finally let go:
1. You still have his phone number memorized
No matter how long it has been since you broke up, if you can still blurt out his number on the top of your head like it is your social security number, you may need to re-evaluate what you choose to memorize.
2. You stalk him on social media multiple times a week or daily
Do you find yourself searching his name the moment you log onto Facebook or Twitter? Do you like every picture he posts on Instagram or even go to the point of commenting? Do you constantly re-watch his Snapchat stories? If you do, you should probably un-follow or delete him because you just look clingy, desperate, and possibly psychotic.
3. You still communicate
Unless you ended things on good terms and you don’t have an ounce of feelings for him anymore, please stop talking to him. You broke up for a reason -- there is no need for an explanation, no need to make him jealous, or any other reason you can come up with to talk to him.
4. You change your daily routine to possibly run into him
You know how he goes to get coffee every Tuesday morning at 7 five minutes from your house? Yeah, you probably wake up extra early that morning to get coffee there too. Or you just happen to be in his neighborhood, so you slowly drive by his house and maybe even honk your horn to say hi …
Lord, I hope you have enough respect for yourself to actually not do this, because it is borderline stalker-like. No, actually it is stalker-like, so save yourself a restraining order and stop this immediately.
5. You compulsively check your phone to see if he has called or texted you
If every ring, vibration, or notification makes your heart skip a beat and you find yourself hoping it is your ex, then maybe you should throw your phone away.
6. You re-read old messages, notes, etc.
Just do yourself a favor and delete, shred, or burn these. You don’t need to reminisce on the past and kill yourself over figuring out what went wrong.
7. You still sleep in his clothes
Going back to the burning thing … yeah you should probably make a giant bonfire this fall, invite all your friends, and enjoy some delicious s'mores over all his sweatshirts, shirts, etc.
8. You get jealous when he moves on
You know that girl he posted a picture on Instagram with? Of course you do. You even know her birthday, her favorite color, her last boyfriend, and even her mom’s maiden name. You probably have spent hours stalking her and comparing every one of her social media pictures with yours. You probably even ask all your friends if she is prettier than you. If that doesn’t say jealousy, I don’t know what does.
9. You still talk to his mom
Honestly, she probably doesn’t like you. If he has moved on from you then most likely his mom has too. Please stop calling her and begging her to talk some sense into her son.
10. You don’t let yourself move on
A lot of guys are probably giving you attention, but yet you only see your ex. You are holding onto your past in the hopes he will come back. Let me give you a reality check, this isn’t a fairy tale, you aren’t a princess, and he isn’t coming back. It’s time to move on because you will only make yourself more miserable until you do.
So, if you do any or all of the above, please save what's left of your dignity and move on. It’s time to let go of those dreams and the future wedding you have created in your head. Flip the page and write a new fairy tale.
It is OK to be sad, but it is not OK to be stuck. When you are stuck on someone who broke your heart, you let him win. Don’t let him win; walk away with your head held high and go find a guy who is actually worth your time.
And always remember: “He is very dreamy, but he is not the sun. You are.” ("Grey's Anatomy")
