We all have days where we don't want to get out of bed, don't have the motivation to get things done or simply just don't feel good enough. These feelings suck.
When you think about all the things or people that you love, do you include yourself? Most likely not. If you're anything like me, you often put people's feelings on a much higher pedestal than your own. Sometimes, doing this time after time begins to convince you that you're not good enough or not as important as the other person. You are constantly feeling the pressure from society to live up to unrealistic expectations. But why?
"Oh, baby, you should go and love yourself" are the famous lyrics from Justin Bieber. But is it really that easy? Can you just wake up and "love" yourself?
The answer is no and what does it exactly mean to "love yourself"?
Loving yourself is a learning process. It is not just a written check list that is the same for everyone. It can mean doing different things, big or small for each person. Loving yourself is so much easier said (or sung) than done. It can take time and we're all guaranteed to have bad days once in a while. But, no matter what a person defines as "loving yourself," it is important for everyone to do.
I have never thought of loving yourself to be as important as it is until recently. I've learned that while you're constantly trying to make everyone around you happy, you should be too. It might be a hard concept to grasp, but you deserve to be happy with yourself. Here are four guidelines to jumpstart your new relationship with yourself.
1. Respect yourself.
Having respect for yourself means knowing your boundaries and sticking to them. You should not lower your standards or expectations for anyone. Know what you deserve. Know when too much is too much. Know when to walk away from people who don't make you a better person.
2. Be proud.
Don't be afraid to give yourself a pat on the back for doing something you've been aiming to do for a while. This can mean going for a run, getting a promotion at work or even just doing the dishes that have piled up. Words of encouragement are always good to hear, even if it's coming from the little voice inside your head.
3. Treat others how you want to be treated.
I'm someone who believes in good karma. So do good things for people and with time, good things will happen to you too.
Give compliments! Sometimes receiving a compliment can turn someone's day around. If you see a girl at the mall with nice shoes, tell her! We all love to see someone smile. So what do you have to lose? (She might even tell you where she got them.)
4. Be at peace with your past.
Understand that everyone has done things in their past that they may not want to talk about again. Realizing your mistakes can be a good thing because you know not to repeat it in the future. Know that you don't owe anyone an explanation on past decisions. But do remind yourself that you shouldn't have to change for anyone but yourself. You should want to be a better you, for yourself.
Embrace your imperfections because we all have them and it's okay. These imperfections are what make us human. Remember that you deserve the best and nothing less. If you're searching for love, know that you can't love someone else until you first love yourself. Be happy with the person you see in the mirror.
So like the song goes.. "You should go and love yourself."
