You Can't Rush Your Healing
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

You Can't Rush Your Healing

Darkness has it's teachings. Let it in.

1654
You Can't Rush Your Healing
Jenna Cavanaugh

There is a very beautiful song by Trevor Hall called, "You Can't Rush Your Healing" that my therapist showed me once. That simple statement is one I repeat as a mantra in my head on the tough days.

Healing is often imagined as a line graph with time. The greater distance of time it has been since the hurt, the more healed you'll be, right? Unfortunately it doesn't work that way. Healing can not be measured. It can't be put in a chart or graph. There is no survey to give you an estimated time frame the healing process will be. More often than not, there is no healed, just a journey that varies day to day. Initially, I found this discouraging. Sorting through the muck every single day felt like more effort than it was worth. When will I just get there already? Why is the process so much work?

With the pressures of daily life and society, I tried to rush my healing. I did the minimal work, overly faked the smiles, and said all the right things to those who worried. "The more you push it, the more it's pushing you back." That line couldn't be more accurate. Because after my brief unproductive healing process, I fell flat on my face again. Now what was I supposed to do?

I thought I was doing all of the right things by sucking it up through appointments, doing what I was advised to do, all while assuring my surroundings I was all right. I was doing everything right, except I was rushing my healing. So when I fell on my face that second time, my therapist showed me this song. For the first time, I understood. Healing has no timeline.

Allow yourself to properly mourn regardless how long it's been or how many times you've mourned before. Your body is never wrong. August can feel like the greatest month in the world and then September can suddenly feel like taking 15 steps back. Monday you can take on the world, and Tuesday you can't get out of bed. Pain comes in layers. You aren't going backwards when you feel it after streaks of good, you're just healing even further. Don't fight it off, don't get discouraged or angry. Don't feel the pressures of getting over it. Your body is trying to teach you more about yourself than you've ever known.

I know it can feel terrible but when you sort through the muck and feel that first day of sunshine I don't think there is anything more freeing. So allow yourself a bed day, you earned it. Blast Alanis Morissette and cry your eyes out. Punch pillows. Call into work sick when it hurts the most. Clear your agenda. Walk with no destination. Sit in silence. Break down on your yoga mat. And when the days are brighter than ever, dance around in the mirror in the morning. Run through the streets and smile at the strangers passing by. Laugh your loudest cackle. Splurge on something you've wanted for a while. Hug your friends tighter. Seek opportunities to give back all the joy you feel. Love fearlessly.

Neither feeling will last forever so take the time to feel them as they come. You can't rush your healing.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

56504
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

36384
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

958278
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

188496
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments