Don’t pass off my anger as something in passing, it is here and it is here for a reason! Just because I have learned to mellow myself out does not mean I do not have the ability to snap back as well. Over the years I have taught myself to look at things in a more calm light and have become comfortable letting things brush off of me. I take a lot of situations thrown at me with a light heart almost in a humic way however, I have learned that people tend to take it as If I am never serious. It surprises me each and every time because I am have become very comfortable with myself and how I deal with situations that I don’t see the need to change the way I act, although I have reviewed my own actions and how they could possibly be misleading but that does not allow individuals to never take me as seriously as they take others.
I feel that due to the fact that I do not carry around this intensity in me and instead lead a life absent of a strenuous nature I am depicted as someone who cannot hold a great deal of anger within myself. If given plausible cause and motive I am more than capable of expressing my dissatisfaction on the subject. Being less verbally expressive on my negativity does not make me any less susceptible to negativity. I am as human as any other individual. Instances in which my anger is defined as a defense mechanism or over exaggeration take a toll on my character, especially when I have a right cause to be upset.
I tend to deal with situations where I am not taken seriously and sadly because of that I have to deal with my own anger rather than that situation or individual I have intended to direct it upon. I know it sounds, and probably is something I should not practice or advocate for but in the small frequency in which it does occur I believe I have the right to express myself and be heard as much as anybody else that holds on to that intensity.
One person can only take so much until they finally burst, it is not that I keep all this anger bottled up, but there are enough situations that I face that deserve some level of hostility that I usually tend to stray away from. I would define myself as a very passive individual in many cases however, the accumulation of fault that I receive because of that is almost suffocating, as if the only way for my anger to be justified is if I constantly am angry and clearly vocalize it. No, I am not being dramatic and no, I'm not angry just to respond to your own account of anger. I am upset and rightfully so at whatever unpleasantness I have faced and should garner the same respect and attention as anyone else.
