I was born on a dark and stormy night in September of 1996 (I don't actually recall what the weather was like) in Pine Bluff, Arkansas. For those of you who aren't familiar with Pine Bluff, it's a lovely town about 30 minutes south of Little Rock that smells of danger and the paper mill. I lived there until I was five years old, then moved to what my grandparents call the land of the "yankees," also known as Jonesboro. This short timeline of my life is to let you know that I didn't grow up barefoot in a bayou, therefore I don't know where or why or how I acquired such a strong accent. There are words I pronounce strangely and phrases I have misheard throughout the years due to other people's accents. Here are a few of my favorites.
1. Oil
You know how normal people get stage fright when they are about to dance or give a speech or sing a solo? I get stage fright when I have to say the word "oil." My family is used to it, but when I say "ull" around a stranger, all of a sudden I'm a hillbilly. Going to the shop to request an "oy-uhl" change is a nightmare because I feel like I'm trying too hard when I use two syllables, but I sound like I grew up in the woods when I use one.
2. Chest of drawers
Did you know that the piece of furniture you likely have somewhere in your house is called a "chest of drawers?" I don't get embarrassed easily, but when I figured this out, my face turned to the color of a tomato and I nearly burst into flames. I blame my family's southern accent on this, but for nearly twenty years, I thought they were called "chester drawers." So now when I see them, all I can think of is Chester Cheetah sitting atop his furniture, mocking me for my decades of ignorance.
3. Fixin'
"I'm fixin' to go to the gym," "I'm fixin' to eat supper," and "I'm fixin' to take a shower" are phrases I use every day. But do they make sense? Fixing what? Definitely not my awful accent. Ironically, I am an English major, so you think I would never use such poisonous words. This is not the case. I'm fixin' to enroll myself in a "lose your accent" class if it gets any worse.
After a trip to New York City nearly two years ago, I had heard, "where are you from?" and "your country accent is adorable" one too many times. It has been my mission ever since to at least try to sound like I went to school. My New Year's resolution this year was to make myself add the "ing" on words. It's not goin' well but I won't stop tryin'.
