"Abby, that boy just said the R word. It hurt my feelings," a special needs boy said to me.

One too many times I have witnessed the special needs kids I work with day in and day out crying, upset that they heard the word "retard."

Once upon a time, the word "retard" was used in a way that described a delay, hindrance or an impedance. But over the years, approximately 600 years, the word has turned into a derogatory remark used to replace the insults of "idiot" or "stupid."

You may use the argument that the R-word means to "slow down" and "was used at some point as a normal word." Yes, it does mean to delay or hold back and yes at some point it was used as a normal verb. But when you are using it in a parallel with insulting someone, you are insulting physically and mentally handicapped people whether you realize it or not.

Some people say, "Choose a different word," as I did for a long time. But when I got to thinking I soon realized, "Why choose a different word when you can choose no word at all?" So my question is, why use the R word when you can choose to not say anything at all? Growing up I was told every day, "If you have nothing nice to say then don't say anything at all." Sure, my parents might have instilled different morals within me than you, but that does not give you an excuse for using that term.

Maybe you don't think it's a big deal, so let me paint you a picture. Have you ever loved someone to the point where when they hurt, you hurt? I'm sure someone's name or face just popped into your head. Well in my life so far I had loved dozens of special needs people that I've been blessed to get to know, and when these friends come up to me in tears because they heard the R word in the hallway it breaks my heart because they know that they are being used as the butt of a joke. They know what it means and they know you are making fun of them. Unlike you, whereas you don't know the damage you're causing.

I am a part of an organization called Best Buddies which is a global volunteer movement that creates opportunities for one-to-one friendships, integrated employment and leadership development for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities. In Best Buddies we have a campaign called "Spread the Word to End the Word" which aims to raise awareness about the impact of the R word. So please, spread the word to end the word. Speak up to those who use it and let's put an end to this terrible connotation of this hurtful word.