Why Dating In Today's Society Sucks

Why Dating In Today's Society Sucks

No one wants to admit they have feelings.
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Here's the situation about dating in the 21st century: it sucks. Why does it suck? No one wants to show any emotion toward each other and no one wants to treat anyone the way they should be treated. No one wants to own up to commitment and no one wants to focus on anyone but themselves.

We live in a world where people don't go on dates. If someone does ask you on a date, it comes off too strong. Why is asking to take someone out to grab a bite of food and getting to know someone considered coming off too strong? Who knows. We live in the digital age of communicating over text and Snapchat rather than taking a walk and getting to know someone in person. Because sending someone a Snapchat of the cheeseburger you ordered at Red Robin with the caption "much needed" is better than actually getting to know a person.

We live in an age where we don't actually define relationships. You've been talking for three months? You go out to eat, he takes you to his friends' parties, to meet his family, yet don't you dare ask what the definition of your relationship is. You're just "a friend," you're just "talking." Why? Because everyone in this day and age is so damn afraid of commitment. Because if there's no label on the relationship it's easier for them to run away and act like it's nothing, then admit they ever had feelings.

I've been single long enough to know these games, I know the ropes of a millennial's version of "dating" and I'm kind of over it. Don't ask me to come "watch Netflix and chill" because I know what that means. Don't text me at 1 a.m. on a Saturday because I won't be impressed. It's getting to the point where the young people of this generation need to man up. If you want to be single, do whatever you want. The dating scene, however, is just a pathetic field right now.

No one dates anymore and no one is willing to get to know each other. I bet if for one second we stopped caring about ourselves in our own self-absorbed worlds of Snapchat, Instagram, and Twitter we could actually see the amazing people the world has to offer. We complain about how we're single, but we don't actually do anything about it.

In this day and age you have to calculate if you're even in the dating game at all. If he texts back too fast, do you text slower to let him know you're not too eager? If he asks to hang out, do you pretend you're busy? If he Snapchats you, do you wait a grace period before opening so he doesn't think you were waiting for it? I really think these are all pathetic, overthought, and minuscule details we should be worrying about. Why must we pretend we don't care, why must we pretend we're emotionally unavailable?

I used to kind of go along with this bull sh*t until recently. A few months ago I was, I guess "talking" to a guy. It wasn't anything serious, pretty casual. Until he decided to end it. He ended it via text message. I was furious. I blamed the guy at first. Why end things with someone you have been talking to for a couple months over text message? We weren't dating though, it was a non-breakup text. I was pissed at him because I didn't even deserve the face-to-face contact of "here's why I don't like you anymore." Now, I don't blame him. I blame society. Our millennial society has literally told us it's OK to do that. It's OK to confess your feelings over text rather than face to face.

That's when I decided I'm done with this shitty limbo of the millennial dating world. I'm not going to let myself get trapped in this emotional tug of war with meaningless "hangouts" with shallow guys. Guys who aren't man enough to express their feelings face to face. I'm sure a lot of people feel the same way about this, in fact I know a lot of people do. Let's start respecting other people's feelings, OK?

Cover Image Credit: destinationfemme.com

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17 Empowering Bible Verses For Women

You go, girl.
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We all have those days where we let the negative thoughts that we're "not good enough," "not pretty enough" or "not smart enough" invade our minds. It's easy to lose hope in these situations and to feel like it would be easier to just give up. However, the Bible reminds us that these things that we tell ourselves are not true and it gives us the affirmations that we need. Let these verses give you the power and motivation that you're lacking.

1. Proverbs 31:25

"She is clothed with strength and dignity and she laughs without fear of the future."

2. Psalm 46:5

"God is within her, she will not fall."

3. Luke 1:45

"Blessed is she who believed that the Lord would fulfill His promises to her."

4. Proverbs 31:17

"She is energetic and strong, a hard worker."

5. Psalm 28:7

"The Lord is my strength and my shield."

6. Proverbs 11:16

"A gracious woman gains respect, but ruthless men gain only wealth."

7. Joshua 1:9

"Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."

8. Proverbs 31:30

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised."

9. 1 Corinthians 15:10

"By the grace of God, I am what I am."

10. Proverbs 31:26

"When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness."

11. Psalm 139:14

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made."

12. 1 Peter 3:3-4

"Don't be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God."

13. Colossians 2:10

"And in Christ you have been brought to fullness."

14. 2 Timothy 1:7

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline."

15. Jeremiah 29:11

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' says the Lord. 'They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.'"

16. Exodus 14:14

"The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm."

17. Song of Songs 4:7

"You are altogether beautiful, my darling, beautiful in every way."

Next time you're feeling discouraged or weak, come back to these verses and use them to give you the strength and power that you need to conquer your battles.

Cover Image Credit: Julia Waterbury

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Cancel Culture Is Toxic And Ugly

Stop deciding for me who I can and cannot like.

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I was really hoping that canceled culture died in 2018, but unfortunately here we are in 2019 still "canceling" whoever we personally deem "problematic." Whether it's tweeting from six years ago or falsely made allegations, waves of people will grab on to anything they can to bring down whatever celebrity or influencer seems to be doing well at the moment.

Of course, it is important to bring light to horrible things such as racism, misogyny, domestic abuse, etc., but remember these horrible things are still happening TODAY. We need to focus our energy on combating the horrible things people are currently doing and saying; it is truly such a waste of time to bring up the problematic words and actions that someone in the limelight did almost a decade ago.

Let me be clear, there is no one person I am trying to defend here. I honestly don't care much to personally defend anyone who is being canceled by angry twitter-users who found something just bad enough to hold against them for eternity. I truly just find the idea of it annoying and ugly.

The idea that any person is a completely static, flat character is so inconceivable and unlikely that I truly have a hard time understanding why we cannot accept an apology from a matured person.

If we have no evidence that a person has made any recent damaging remarks, then how can we prove they haven't changed since they tweeted something wrong in 2013?

Of course, there are people who have recently or continuously proven they are indecent people who are not deserving of any sort of public exposure, but if they are truly so horrible, people will drop them without you having to tell them to do so. You don't have to condemn those who still remain loyal; they are probably not the kind of people you need to waste your time on anyway.

If the people canceling others were constantly watched like the people they have damned, I am absolutely sure there is something we could find from their past to cancel them as well.

Sometimes it is hard to remember that famous people are still human beings just like us. Anyone is prone to make mistakes, and those mistakes can absolutely be rectified over time.

Nowadays, people love jumping on the bandwagon of finding a new person to hate and don't even stop to think about the damage it could do to that person's life and reputation.

Give people a chance to prove that they are decent human beings before deciding whether "we" as a whole should love or hate them based on such a small amount of evidence.

I am not saying you have to love every celebrity. If you don't like what someone has said or done you absolutely do not have to give them your attention or devotion, but you should not tell me whether I can like them or not.

In 2019 we should put an end to canceled culture, and, instead, learn to take people at their word and accept their apologies for their past wrongdoings.

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