Why Dating In Today's Society Sucks

Why Dating In Today's Society Sucks

No one wants to admit they have feelings.
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Here's the situation about dating in the 21st century: it sucks. Why does it suck? No one wants to show any emotion toward each other and no one wants to treat anyone the way they should be treated. No one wants to own up to commitment and no one wants to focus on anyone but themselves.

We live in a world where people don't go on dates. If someone does ask you on a date, it comes off too strong. Why is asking to take someone out to grab a bite of food and getting to know someone considered coming off too strong? Who knows. We live in the digital age of communicating over text and Snapchat rather than taking a walk and getting to know someone in person. Because sending someone a Snapchat of the cheeseburger you ordered at Red Robin with the caption "much needed" is better than actually getting to know a person.

We live in an age where we don't actually define relationships. You've been talking for three months? You go out to eat, he takes you to his friends' parties, to meet his family, yet don't you dare ask what the definition of your relationship is. You're just "a friend," you're just "talking." Why? Because everyone in this day and age is so damn afraid of commitment. Because if there's no label on the relationship it's easier for them to run away and act like it's nothing, then admit they ever had feelings.

I've been single long enough to know these games, I know the ropes of a millennial's version of "dating" and I'm kind of over it. Don't ask me to come "watch Netflix and chill" because I know what that means. Don't text me at 1 a.m. on a Saturday because I won't be impressed. It's getting to the point where the young people of this generation need to man up. If you want to be single, do whatever you want. The dating scene, however, is just a pathetic field right now.

No one dates anymore and no one is willing to get to know each other. I bet if for one second we stopped caring about ourselves in our own self-absorbed worlds of Snapchat, Instagram, and Twitter we could actually see the amazing people the world has to offer. We complain about how we're single, but we don't actually do anything about it.

In this day and age you have to calculate if you're even in the dating game at all. If he texts back too fast, do you text slower to let him know you're not too eager? If he asks to hang out, do you pretend you're busy? If he Snapchats you, do you wait a grace period before opening so he doesn't think you were waiting for it? I really think these are all pathetic, overthought, and minuscule details we should be worrying about. Why must we pretend we don't care, why must we pretend we're emotionally unavailable?

I used to kind of go along with this bull sh*t until recently. A few months ago I was, I guess "talking" to a guy. It wasn't anything serious, pretty casual. Until he decided to end it. He ended it via text message. I was furious. I blamed the guy at first. Why end things with someone you have been talking to for a couple months over text message? We weren't dating though, it was a non-breakup text. I was pissed at him because I didn't even deserve the face-to-face contact of "here's why I don't like you anymore." Now, I don't blame him. I blame society. Our millennial society has literally told us it's OK to do that. It's OK to confess your feelings over text rather than face to face.

That's when I decided I'm done with this shitty limbo of the millennial dating world. I'm not going to let myself get trapped in this emotional tug of war with meaningless "hangouts" with shallow guys. Guys who aren't man enough to express their feelings face to face. I'm sure a lot of people feel the same way about this, in fact I know a lot of people do. Let's start respecting other people's feelings, OK?

Cover Image Credit: destinationfemme.com

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When You Give A Girl A Dad

You give her everything
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They say that any male can be a father, but it takes a special person to be a dad. That dads are just the people that created the child, so to speak, but rather, dads raise their children to be the best they can be. Further, when you give a little girl a dad, you give her much more than a father; you give her the world in one man.


When you give a girl a dad, you give her a rock.

Life is tough, and life is constantly changing directions and route. In a world that's never not moving, a girl needs something stable. She needs something that won't let her be alone; someone that's going to be there when life is going great, and someone who is going to be there for her when life is everything but ideal. Dads don't give up on this daughters, they never will.


When you give a girl a dad, you give her a role model.

If we never had someone to look up to, we would never have someone to strive to be. When you give a little girl someone to look up to, you give her someone to be. We copy their mannerisms, we copy their habits, and we copy their work ethic. Little girls need someone to show them the world, so that they can create their own.


When you give a girl a dad, you give her the first boy she will ever love.

And I'm not really sure someone will ever be better than him either. He's the first guy to take your heart, and every person you love after him is just a comparison to his endless, unmatchable love. He shows you your worth, and he shows you what your should be treated like: a princess.


When you give a girl a dad, you give her someone to make proud.

After every softball game, soccer tournament, cheerleading competition, etc., you can find every little girl looking up to their dads for their approval. Later in life, they look to their dad with their grades, internships, and little accomplishments. Dads are the reason we try so hard to be the best we can be. Dads raised us to be the very best at whatever we chose to do, and they were there to support you through everything. They are the hardest critics, but they are always your biggest fans.


When you give a girl a dad, you give her a credit card.

It's completely true. Dads are the reason we have the things we have, thank the Lord. He's the best to shop with too, since he usually remains outside the store the entire time till he is summoned in to forge the bill. All seriousness, they always give their little girls more than they give themselves, and that's something we love so much about you.


When you give a girl a dad, you give her a shoulder to cry on.

When you fell down and cut yourself, your mom looked at you and told you to suck it up. But your dad, on the other hand, got down on the ground with you, and he let you cry. Then later on, when you made a mistake, or broke up with a boy, or just got sad, he was there to dry your tears and tell you everything was going to be okay, especially when you thought the world was crashing down. He will always be there to tell you everything is going to be okay, even when they don't know if everything is going to be okay. That's his job.


When you give a girl a dad, you give her a lifelong best friend.

My dad was my first best friend, and he will be my last. He's stood by me when times got tough, he carried me when I just couldn't do it anymore, and he yelled at me when I deserved it; but the one thing he has never done was give up on me. He will always be the first person I tell good news to, and the last person I ever want to disappoint. He's everything I could ever want in a best friend and more.


Dads are something out of a fairytale. They are your prince charming, your knight in shinny amour, and your fairy godfather. Dads are the reasons we are the people we are today; something that a million "thank you"' will never be enough for.

Cover Image Credit: tristen duhon

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College Can Be Difficult, But Trust Yourself, Girl

Life can throw you curveballs sometimes, and times can get tough, but it is SO important to pick yourself up and trust that you can do anything.

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I'll be honest, this school year was one of the hardest years of my life. There were lots of moments throughout the year that I just wanted to go home and get away from it all. I had to be reminded that I have been raised to try as hard as you possibly can, and I was doing that. It took some determination and time, but I didn't give up.

No matter how bad I felt, I stayed and persevered.

Now that I am home for the summer, I have been reminiscing on the past two semesters of school. At the beginning of the school year, I had a much different idea of how it would go. It was going to be "my year," but somehow while the year was going on, I felt that I had been completely wrong. It's easy to come to quick conclusions when life doesn't exactly go your way. Conclusions like "this year has been the worst year ever" and "I can never get a break" were often popping up in my head. My grades weren't where I wanted them, and I was surprised by a lot of occurrences that I never expected to happen (imagine a wild ride). I found out who my true friends are and who I could rely on, and luckily, my circle only grew. Being extremely extroverted, it was hard for me to get out and just do something. Being in this "rut" took a toll on me. I had to make those hard decisions about doing what was best for me in the long run instead of doing something just for the moment. Trust me when I say, this was NOT easy at all.

Through all the tears and change all around me, I decided to proceed to the finish line because I am NOT a quitter.

I decided that it was time for me to allow myself to fully, undeniably be me. I wanted to start doing the little things I enjoy again like working out, taking pictures, and simply just going out to do anything. I started forcing myself to take any opportunity that came my way, and it helped. One of the things that brought me so much joy was kickboxing – talk about therapeutic, people! Kickboxing at least three times a week helped my mood shift so much, and it was a start to seeing me again. I am so blessed with friends who would come over at, literally, any time of the day. Spending time with them helped me more than they could ever know. We did anything from just hanging out in my living room to splurging on a fun dinner. Through everything that I was doing daily, I was learning how to rely on myself. Looking back now, I have never really had to know what it felt like to rely mainly on myself. I did get so much help from my family and friends, but what good could their help do if I didn't want to help myself first?

Even though I felt like this was one of the worst years of my life, it taught me so much more than I ever expected. Looking back now, I grew so, so much. I learned how to smile when times get tough. I learned that it really is okay to not be okay sometimes, and it will be okay eventually. I learned that it's okay to ask for help because we weren't made to do life alone. Most importantly, I learned how to trust myself. My hope for anyone reading this, you will learn from my experience that the worst seasons get better. I am in such a good place right now because I never gave up, and I will continue to never give up. In a short amount of time, I am seeing how far I have come and how much I grew.

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