Every Thursday night, I coach an intermediate tumbling class. The point of the class is to be able to do a back handspring so you can move up to advanced tumbling. I have seven girls in my class ranging in age from 6 to 17.
Last Thursday night, I told one of my older girls, a 14-year-old, to throw her round off back handspring. When she did, I told her to leave my class and go over to the advanced class. Here's the heartbreaking dialogue that followed:
14: "I can't! They're all better than me!"
Me: "So? You're going with them to get better!"
14: "But they're all younger than me! It's embarrassing!"
My heart sunk, as I knew exactly how she felt. I told her about how when I was 14, I was also in a tumbling class, but we did a recital performance. 4 year olds went out there and threw skills I couldn't. I was one of only two kids in the whole class who couldn't do a bridge kickover, so I had to fake it. Now THAT was humiliating.
But it made me wonder - why does everyone over the age of 9, find it so hard to believe in themselves? Who ingrained this fear of rejection and humiliation in our heads?
We question ourselves every day. Is this the right outfit? Did I say the right thing? And, worst of all: am I doing the right thing?
Why is it that schools find it so important that we know the Pythagorean Theorem and the quadratic formula and how to analyze text, but don't seem to care if we know how to shake a hand, do our taxes, or buy a house? What's more is that they really don't care if we are confident in ourselves. They think that as long as we stay off the ledge of the roof, we're doing okay.
This is not to say that school isn't important, because it is. What I'm saying is that we all need to remember the one key to success we all often struggle with: believing in ourselves.
I didn't believe in myself at first. I figured I would never be a professional writer (read: would never be paid to write).
Look at me now. I'm a student, gymnastics coach, business manager for an Etsy shop AND a professional writer.
Who says you can't be a nurse, fly a plane, or star in a movie? Who says you can't tack on an extra major? The sad part is that there are people out there that have or will. But the worst part is that you might believe them.
So, whenever a kid in my class says "I can't", I tell them they can. Sometimes they argue and sometimes they stare blankly. But either way, my second reply is the same - "But, my dear, you can try, and that is what matters."
