The struggle in my head on whether or not to even write this article was real. This is such a taboo topic for many girls because we are supposed to be organized, detailed and tidy. However, I need other girls to know they aren't alone in this fight, so here we go.

The reality of the issue is women and girls with ADHD often fly under the radar, diagnosed later in life or never at all. WebMD says that little boys are three times more likely to be diagnosed than a little girl. However, over time, that likelihood shrinks to two times and eventually to one as girls become women. It becomes more and more evident that we just can't get ourselves together.

In a more general sense, ADHD brains are actually understimulated because they lack dopamine and have issues moving it within the brain. Our connection to our frontal lobe is also terrible, so you can imagine the issues that causes. It's a nightmare for executive functions like problem solving, inhibitory control, cognitive flexibility and working memory.

I was diagnosed as a college junior with the disorder, so I spent the first 20 years of my life undiagnosed and wondering why I wasn't like other girls. You know that saying "fake it 'till you make it?" That was me for all those years. My poor mother should have known I'd be ADHD when I couldn't even be still long enough for her to give birth to me.

I got kicked out of dance when I was three because I was too busy untying everyone's ballet slippers to dance. My teacher would waste half the class just re-tying all the shoes I untied. My dance career was short-lived.

I was always the little girl on the playground dragging my friends around because I moved at lightning pace. I was always climbing something, bouncing on something, or running around something (or somebody). I was usually covered in dirt or grass stains because I never wanted to just sit down and play dolls.

Guess what? I'm still like that!

I'm also an exception to the "ADHD in women" rule. Typical symptoms of ADHD in women and girls are day-dreaminess, anxiety and depression, excessive talking and trouble maintaining friendships to name a few. I have all those struggles plus the hyperactivity of a boy. Our first real suspicion was my inability to sit still during one of our schools infamous floor meetings. They made me run laps up and down the hall in an attempt to get me to calm down. You can see that below--our floor was pretty much a circus wherever I lived.

To be perfectly honest, at first I was ashamed. My fears of not being normal had been confirmed by a professional in our school's psychology department. She told me, "yes, you definitely have it. You scored high in both hyperactivity and impulse". My heart sunk at the thought of being labeled. I even hid it from my mom and the rest of my family for nearly a year. I felt relief though too, because I could finally explain myself.

Anxiety and depression are major struggles of a girl with ADHD and I'm no exception. I struggled with the depression part in my teen years, but now as a young adult, my anxiety levels have spiked even higher. Sometimes the anxiety causes toddler-like freak-outs, which I feel shame to admit. I feel even more shamewhen it happens. Thankfully, this is a very rare situation, it takes a lot to cause a total meltdown. For having ADHD I have a very laid-back outlook on pretty much everything. I go for walks when I have too much energy built up. I have late night adventures. I surround myself with girl friends who are either like me in the risk-taking, adventure-seeking, playful mentality or are able to give me the grace it takes to be my friend because some days are totally worse than others. Sometimes, I honestly embarrass myself with the things that I can't help but say and do because my body just does them.

No, I can't change it. No, I don't want medication.

I won't even get into the impulse issue. So many blunt things have flown out of my mouth before I could even fully think them. Usually, my bluntness is to point out a fault. I'm so thankful that my friends understand that this is an unchangeable part of me and they've actually come to appreciate the honesty. But, moving on...

From what I've just described, I've made my life sound miserable. But let me give you the flip side.

I tell my friends all the time that I have superpowers because their are some serious perks to ADHD.

I can do this fun thing called hyperfocus. That means that when I'm doing something I love to do you will not get my attention unless you're practically screaming my name. I'm also super creative--my brain is hardwired to daydream and imagine. In some ways I'll eternally be a child; this is one of them. I have so much more fun in life than some of my peers because I just don't give a rip about the social norms. If I think something will be fun, I'm going to do it. I'm also up for spontaneous trips to just about anywhere. I also love to take a risk. I'm the youth leader at the church who is willingly in the mud pit, the student that brought a baby snake in the professors office because it was neat, the one who was voted to be the purple minion for a group Halloween costume because it's just too perfect, the friend on the wrong side of the safety railing and the one pretending earbuds are eyeballs.

I also have the interpersonal advantage on generosity. I love to give. Want half of my chocolate chip cookie? Sure, take it! You're thirsty? Take my bottle of water. Need a friend to spare some time so you can cry on their shoulder? I'll make a cup of tea and you can cry on me. I like to think this makes up for some of the pointed things I say. Finally, I truly believe in the power of love. I think love can fix anything and I shower everyone I love with as much affection as I can. I feel things way deeper than most people.

If you are a woman reading this and you think you have or know you have ADHD, be encouraged that you are very unique in design and God is going to use you in ways other women would not ever be willing to be used. It's nothing to feel shame about. I eventually stopped asking God to heal it and instead asked him to use it. My story isn't every woman's story--some have it easier, some have it harder. Do what works for you.

For more info, take a look at this website.

Until next time, friends.