Whenever something tragic or bad happens people tend to react differently. Some people feel the need to always be strong and others always tend to break down. The people that stay strong through it all feel like if they break down, they are weak. That is not the case. Take it from someone who always feels the need to stay strong and hide my emotions. It's not easy to stay strong all the time, sometimes you need to break down. It is actually healthier to break down when you need to rather than trying to stay strong.
These past two weeks I have been dealing with a lot that I never thought I would have to deal with. Going through these past couple of weeks I have been trying to not let my emotions show. There have been days where all I have wanted to do is cry but I have kept on going and trying to go through my daily routine. To be honest I hate crying. I always feel weak when I cry but every time I have cried in the past two weeks I have felt better and stronger after I have let my emotions out. I always try to be strong but sometimes it is just not that easy, especially when you have a lot to be worrying about.
When my dad passed away, I always felt like crying, but I would never breakdown in front of people unless I absolutely had to, I always tried to keep a brave face on. Even now as I reflect on everything that has been going on in my life in the last three year,s I still wonder if I can still be as strong as I have been. This brought me to a conclusion: my anxiety and stress has reached an all-time high. I am now discovering that always trying to be a strong person is not always a good thing. It really does mess with your mental health. If you ever feel like breaking down, do not be afraid to let it happen. Being strong is not worth making yourself worry all the time. Do not try and hide behind your emotions.
I have been hiding behind my emotions for a long time. It has done nothing but be detrimental to me. I am definitely learning about growing up through all of this and it is not easy but it does get easier to not always be hiding behind emotions. I hate showing certain emotions because I do not want to be judged by people but I am learning that your true friends care for you and the people that judge you for breaking down are not really there for you.